Butch Femme Planet - View Single Post

SuperFemme · 12-08-2009, 11:47 PM

Feeling invisible is never a good thing. Invisibility is a fact of life for me as a Femme. I have to come out over and over again.

Blanket statements and generalizations suck. One person cannot speak for the masses. I cringe when I see them, and often address them gently.

As for not being invited to conversations? I can dissect it. I believe it is not only ok but absolutely necessary to carve out safe spaces in our community where sub-groups can discuss. Usually these spaces are not exclusionary, but ask participants not in the sub-group to refrain from speaking the truth of the sub-group. That doesn't mean others cannot participate, it means they are being asked to speak their truth. Not the truth the believe to be somebody elses. It's kind of like a backwards blanket statement.

For example, if I went into a thread about trans people and spoke about the effects of taking testosterone. I don't take it. My partner does, but that is kind of irrelevant. How could I possibly know the shoes another is walking in? As an ally it is tempting to jump in, but there is nothing to offer from my me place. I'm not trans. So I read. Or go to a thread about partners of trans people because I have a journey that is relevant.

Pixiestars. Thank you for your post. It reads to me like you choose to be silent for various reasons. That doesn't mean I am right, it is just my read. May I ask you if you *feel* silence when working within your boundaries?

12-08-2009, 11:47 PM	#5
SuperFemme Timed Out How Do You Identify?: Permanently Banned 10/24/2010 Preferred Pronoun?: She. Relationship Status: Married (one of 18,000) Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Atascadero, CA Posts: 4,933 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,309 Thanked 7,108 Times in 2,327 Posts Rep Power: 0	Feeling invisible is never a good thing. Invisibility is a fact of life for me as a Femme. I have to come out over and over again. Blanket statements and generalizations suck. One person cannot speak for the masses. I cringe when I see them, and often address them gently. As for not being invited to conversations? I can dissect it. I believe it is not only ok but absolutely necessary to carve out safe spaces in our community where sub-groups can discuss. Usually these spaces are not exclusionary, but ask participants not in the sub-group to refrain from speaking the truth of the sub-group. That doesn't mean others cannot participate, it means they are being asked to speak their truth. Not the truth the believe to be somebody elses. It's kind of like a backwards blanket statement. For example, if I went into a thread about trans people and spoke about the effects of taking testosterone. I don't take it. My partner does, but that is kind of irrelevant. How could I possibly know the shoes another is walking in? As an ally it is tempting to jump in, but there is nothing to offer from my me place. I'm not trans. So I read. Or go to a thread about partners of trans people because I have a journey that is relevant. Pixiestars. Thank you for your post. It reads to me like you choose to be silent for various reasons. That doesn't mean I am right, it is just my read. May I ask you if you feel silence when working within your boundaries?