[Sunny]

Originally Posted by perfekly_flawed

Good morning Singles

I've spent a few days pulled inside myself again. I feel like I'm playing a horrible game of hopscotch these days. I take 2 steps forward and then before I can celebrate, I FEEL like I've taken 3 steps backwards.

I'm going thru the motions of "moving on" and doing all the right things with my time and energy but when it's dark and I'm supposed to be resting for the next day - I find myself so incredibly sad and missing my ex that I'm tempted to call or reach out to her in some way. I haven't done that in MONTHS and I know if I told her I needed her for anything - she'd be here. But, I also know that she is the same person I left and that nothing would be different besides having missed each other these months.

We would have celebrated 10 years together this coming January. Instead I find myself dreading the upcoming holidays. I normally spend this time picking out the plethora of Christmas/holiday cards that we send out to our friends and family and instead I'm looking at the document used to create the mailing labels each year and trying to decide who *I* should send cards to which ones are more her friends... ugh. Maybe that is what has me down - dealing with all of the practical DETAILS of our breakup.

I'm sorry to be Debbie Downer this morning. I'm feeling very blue and needed to put it out there b/c it's overwhelming me right now.

...

It is not easy to forget those you have loved. I believe a little piece of your heart always stays with them. I will tell you a little story that might make you feel better.
I had an 8 year relationship. It ended because she cheated on me. I was devastated. A few months later my Mother passed away. I went into a shell. A few months later I lost my job. This was too much for me to handle. I remember standing in a Kohls parking lot looking up to the sky and asking what else do you want to take from me. I think that was the lowest point in my life. I did not have any family or friends to help me go through this ugly part of my life. I was all alone. It took time and I healed. I really did not think I would make it.
I hope this might have helped you in some way. Like everyone has stated. We are here for each other. It is best to get it out then keep it in. One door closes and another one opens. I will keep you in my thoughts.