[Soft*Silver]

I confess I feel much better now that I have had this skunk of a mood.

I also came to realize exactly why I have had this snit.

Those of you who know how important synthroid is in your body, will be horrified to know I havent had it since Novemeber 3rd. !!!

I filled all my scripts on that day. They didnt have the Drs ok yet for that one and said they would call her for it. Well, I just forgot. When you take 14 bottles of pills a day, its easy to forget the one. Especially during a holiday month.

While I was sobbing today over accidentally dropping a brand new roll of toilet paper in the toilet bowl (an expensive accident for someone who cant buy it with food stamps) it somehow lit the light bulb over my head that I havent had my synthroid. I traced it back to Novemebr 3rd! I called my pharmacy and got it filled, ran down and picked it up and took my first dose right in the car.

It also explains why I have had tingles in my heels, my fingers, my lips and my tongue, weight gain and these worsening mood swings. Not to mention my insomnia that has gotten much much worse as the days and nights have steadily all become days!

I confess I do this way too frequently with synthroid. I dont take it as seriously as my other drugs because it only cost $10 without insurance, and its to treat something in my neck. Come on. Salt can make it better for goodness sake. Really? I have to take a stupid pills too? But boy oh boy if I dont have that "stupid pill" I am almost institutionalizational (is that a word?)

I am much better now that I know where this is all coming from. I try to be joy based. Yes, yes, it all sucks but my life really is wonderful regardless. Yes yes, I dont have much but Iwill and I just need patience. Its all going to come back to me again. I have been injured. I am not being punished..lol.

I confess I am glad I was able to verbalize my boils and warts here. I couldnt in my real life. Cyberly I was able to let it out. Oh, I did in real too but I couldnt explain it like I did here. I just gnashed my teeth and scared everyone in real. I got cyber hugs and prayers here! I confess I love you all and am so glad I have a safe place to be me..the real me. Funny I can be the real me in cyber but not in my real world...

I confess I am glad the day is over and medicine in in my possession once again...