[Starbuck]

Originally Posted by apocalipstic

my family has a reunion in the Summer and on Christmas eve. I HATE it....and I have carried it over to hate going to my G/Fs family stuff too. Its loud, there is screaming, lots fo sudden movement, controlling behavior and cameras flashing.

I like the letter idea, may work fine with my family. I wish my G/F felt OK telling her parents I am a freak, but she lies to them, so I feel like I need to take over and stop the lies and excuses all around.

I don't do family holidays. Last year I said I would go, then ctried all day and did nto go.....then was bathed in guilt for months to a really disfunctional and ridiculous degree.

I hope we can both get a better grip. Though my parents are dead, the abuse is still in my head.

I have an idea to get away from all this fuss of the holidays of being with your g/f's family: how about the two of you take a small vacation to a bed and breakfast so that there is NO hustle or bustle to speak of, just a new tradition? If you start looking now, you might find one for a Christmas special.