Quote:
Originally Posted by OS Butch
I really don't think I am any different than any other Butch, though it has been pointed out to me that there is a lack of general manners.
With manners on my mind, I would like to know, what manners seem to be lacking in the Butches from the Femmes' point of view. What are the top 3 things a Femme wants to see when going out on a first date?
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I've stood in the rain waiting for a group of (young) andro-butch girls to a) stop talking and actually go through the open door b) stomp their cig butts on the ground
and leave it there and c) look at me waiting and still dilly-dally their way inside. So yes, there is definitely a lack of general manners.
My late partner was Old School. I find that most womyn, butch or otherwise, have lost their sense of chivalry. Here are my top 3:
1) She used to not only help me put my coat on, but she would gently pull my hair from beneath the collar, spread it attractively down my back and straighten my collar if needed. I often got a gentle peck on the back of my neck during the process. In return, I adored her as if she was the most wonderful, most attentive, best dressed, well-mannered, most thoughtful human being who ever walked the earth (and she will always be that to me).
2) She didn't rush to the prize. Our 1st date was leisurely, comfortable and... well... gentle. She wasn't looking for that opportunity to "make her move", she wasn't trying to kiss me on the 1st date, she didn't make sexually explicit innuendos and she kept everything at an affectionate but classy level. She would graze my hand with hers, with a a soft caress instead of trying to capture it like it was a flag to be conquered.
3) She paid attention to ME. Sure we like to hear that we're lovely, sexy, or that we "turn you on", but what's better is to hear that
and to be heard, too. Don't talk over me, don't randomly segue into different topics as if you were doing a stream-of-consciousness recital. Actually focus on what I say, not on whatever point you wanted to make next.
Sorry if this is long-winded and/or preachy, I just feel very strongly about this subject.