[DamselFly]

i want to speak about myself as a stone femme. in a very early post on this thread, i read a definition of a stone femme as either receiving, not giving, or not wanting to be touched sexually in certain ways. neither of these definitions apply to me! when i hear of stone femmes as "receiving, not giving", i really get angry! when with a stone butch, i AM giving just as much as i am receiving, only in a different way. first of all, let me say that in the past i have dated almost exclusively stone/tg/FtM butches. i go for that type of energy exchange. when with a Stone Butch, whether tg or not, i feel an exhilaration just to be with hym. i feel proud to be seen by hys side in public- a "this is who i am, this is who WE are"! this pulls at the inmost part of my femininity, my femme-ness. sexually, i adore being w/a stone butch. when i give myself to hym, it is as a precious gift, and the true ones know this and treat me as such. but this giving is NOT a passive "just lay there"! in my giving myself and getting hys energy, hys passion, hys tenderness, i give back mine in return. perhaps more subtly and in different ways than w/a non-stone butch. for example, i would never touch a stone butch in a feminizing way, and i find out beforehand where hys boundaries are. but i move with hys rhythm, i run my hands down hys back and body where appropriate, i wrap my legs around hym...and GO with hym! hys taking/my receiving go back and forth in a yin-yang flow that is the essence of the stone dance. i WANT hys taking me as hys gift. the energy is equal in quality but not in means. i don't want to touch a butch like hy touches me. (one BIG reason i'm a femme and a stone/transensual femme.) i am not a lipstick lesbian-i am a FEMME.
i hope that this makes some sense and helps put an end to the canard that stone femmes just receive. of course, this is just one queer stone femme's perspective. it is my truth.
namaste,
DamselFly
i apologize for so many caps, but this is a subject that i get very passionate about!