[Soft*Silver]

you know, I F**king hate labels. I come from a time when the word LESBIAN wasnt even spoken out loud and now we are cyberbating over what we should call ourselves when we look in a mirror.

I am an old crow. Silver hair and wrinkles. I have seen alot happen over my 5+ decades in the rainbow culture. This generation of LGBTQ is going to go down in history/herstory as the one who out-defined themselves. This generation is so out, that they need to cloak their visibility (an oxi-moron, I know) with words embodied with massive power, so the labels are minutely defined. These labels then begin to look like carefully cut precious diamonds. Such value, such worth...so priceless are these labels....that we will gnash and tear apart each selection so that the evolution of the labels will be true to who we are..individually and as a rainbow culture.

well, go right ahead. But dont rain on my parade while you do this.

I am a femme, in a relationship with someone who considers himself TG moving to FtM. When he is done transitioning and living fully as the male he is, we will be living a heterosexual lifestyle.

He has it easy with labels. I, on the other hand, do not feel so lucky. I am a lesbian who has been told I should call myself queer. I just hate that word. Its fine for the young ones to use it, but it doesnt seem to go all that well with my cane and flat shoes. You should have seen my family when I told them the "word of the day" for me is queer. Their eyes bugged out. Somehow Aunt Bea doesnt look like a queer...lol. When my daughter is asked what I am, she simply says "mom"...sometimes we forget the answer isnt always in the direction of the question. Sometimes its in the direction of the answer-er.


This is what it boils down to for me. When I go to my gynocologist and she asks me if I am sexually active and I say yes...do I go into the whole damn orgasmic history of me falling in love with a transman?

No. I just say I am.

I came here because its the only thread I have seen on three sites for femmes who are involved with FtM/TG folks. Thats me. THATS who I am. And I need the support of other femmes who are involved with FtM/TG folks. You all can argue till the cows come home over what label needs to pasted on me, while I sit here and wait for someone to start talking about support...and if no one does, then I will just move on....

just my 2cents worth...