Quote:
Originally Posted by Strappie
HI Thread Stalkers and Do'ers!! lol
I have to apologize to each of you. I admit that after I had troubles with the e-cig. I was discouraged again and fell back to my old habits.
I have to tell you that it's FUCKING HARD and all you peeps that have kicked it, I can't tell you how PROUD and HAPPY I am for you! I wonder why the HELL can't I do it?? I know I can, I just haven't to set my mind to it. However, that is part of my problem.
When I quit smoking I have such bad anxiety I can't focus on anything while people say they gain weight from quitting I lose it because I can't stay focused enough to sit in one spot for more than 5 minutes with out losing my mind. I'm up down up down and then I "run" to make it thru the "surges" you know the ones, they only last 10 minutes but to me it feels like it lasts hours. I know some of you have suggested meds. I'm very scared of them to be honest. I have NEVER had to rely on pills, in most cases I don't even take the pills the Doctor prescribes for me for pain or being sick.
I know I have to do this it's something I've talked about and tried doing since entering my 30's and now I'm 45 and here I sit, still a smoker and NOT proud of that.
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Strappie -
Do NOT beat yourself up for this. It IS hard to quit. It is fucking hard!
I know I mentioned here that I used Chantix to quit. I didn't use Chantix the first or second time I tried to quit.
The first time I used patches. And like you, my anxiety was so high that I lost weight and instead of being irritable, I cried at the drop of a hat. I remember day two...getting ready for work...I was actually whistling some tune...and all of a sudden I started sobbing. Just sobbing. It was so whacky. It took me 45 minutes to calm down just to call out of work. My emotions were ALL over the place. I also couldn't sleep and couldn't tolerate being awake. I would come home each night and drink a glass or two of wine so that I would fall asleep by 8pm. I just wanted to get away from thinking about wanting a cig. I last 3.5 months. Which means, I lasted 2 weeks after I finished the patches. That was in my mid-20's.
In my late 30's I tried again. This time I decided to do it cold turkey. I took 4 days off from work over Labor Day and along with my trying to quit smoking g.f., headed to the beach. Cold turkey was horrible for me.
HORRIBLE.
I literally felt like I was jumping out of my skin. Like my skin was crawling. I could not sit down, I was so restless. When it got so bad I would go outside and run down the street at full speed until I couldn't breathe anymore. Over and over again. Probably 10 times a day...and I am not kidding. And I really
didn't care if I looked like an idiot. I really felt like someone who was...well, going through withdrawal!
A week or two after the beach I got on the Chantix, which helped a little, but the withdrwal was over by that point. I lasted a couple of months, I think without cheating. Eventually, I went back. That was about 2.5 years ago (late 30's).
1.5 years ago I did Chantix. I smoked for the first week, quit on schedule and took it for 3 months. I got my provider to agree to give me meds for an extra 3 months. I have been smoke free since that time.
You say you don't want to "rely" on medication. I assure you my friend, you will NOT be feeling that you are relying on it. You will go through the withdrawal, same as usual. The difference is you won't be an anxious wreck, you won't be depressed, and if you cheat it won't give you that "zing" of "hitting that sweet spot" so to speak that all addicts get when they light up a cig after not having one for a while (It will just feel flat and like you are smoking air.). It isn't relying on meds b/c the meds ARE NOT KEEPING YOU FROM SMOKING. You are doing that all by yourself.
The last three days I have been craving cigs like mad. No idea why. Just really crazy bad. I almost bought a pack on Saturday and almost bought a pack today at lunch time. I am glad I didn't. It was hell quitting. Hell.
Know one thing...when you are one of those people who have a really tough time quitting, after you make it on the other side, you will be less likely to pick up again. It is Just. Not. Worth. It.
Hang in there. Seriously consider Chantix.
And if you are like me and connect bars and beer with drinking, don't go out for a while. And only be around non smokers. And switch to hot tea if you drink coffee, or vice versa.
Also, I hear that for many quitting smoking in the summer is easier. For me, that is SO not the case (it is actually probably the summer weather that has kicked my cravings into gear). I seem to connect "good times" and activity with smoking. People think less activity means less smoking. Hell, I used to put my pack of cigs. in my backpack when I would go mountain biking. When we would stop to catch a breather, I would be catching a smoke!