[Thinker]

Originally Posted by Jomore

Ahhh Ms Scarlett!!! Thank you for your vigilance! But not I prefaced the remark with the words "femmes I KNOW" (emphasis added) not you, not all femmes, just a select group of high femmes of my personal accquaintance. I was actually trying to make that distinction, and not make sweeping generalizations, I'm sure you'd look fine in some of my clothes, wanna come over sand lay dressups wimme?

sorry babe, but nothing to get flakey about, OK? I'm just a dumb ol' Butch with poor Internet social skills, still learning, not very savvy.
Suitably chastened, I won't say anything more on the subject.
Sorry
Jo

Originally Posted by Miss Scarlett

Jomore, i appreciate your explanation but not the patronizing and condescending manner with which is delivered.

In addition, your opprobrious use of the terms "babe" and "flakey" cannot be so easily dismissed through your claim of being "...just a dumb ol' Butch with poor Internet social skills, still learning, not very savvy."

You are welcome to send me a PM if you change your mind and wish to discuss this further.

Originally Posted by Bit

Your original post to Jomore came across scathingly condescending and sarcastic, Miss Scarlett, and you had misread and misinterpreted what Jomore actually said.

If it were me who had made such a mistake, I personally would be apologizing for my own rudeness rather than objecting to the answer it got me.

I recently read a thread Medusa started where she asks us all to show some patience and graciousness towards new members. I think that's a good idea. It might save us some embarrasment, especially if the mistake might not be theirs but ours.

I just want to settle all of this down before things get too heated.

The mod team actually appreciates the heck out of members handling these kinds of exchanges amongst themselves. It's a step on the way, we hope, to more civil discourse on these boards.

Jo, your use of the terms 'babe' and 'flakey' are understandably offensive; that particular sentence sounded pretty patronizing.

Miss Scarlett, it does appear you read something different into what Jo was saying about femmes s/he (unsure of pronoun preference) knows. We do appreciate you offering to continue the conversation via PM.

Bit, you're right; we should all work a little harder to make new members feel welcome.......particularly those who are knew to the b/f community in general. Your address to Miss Scarlett probably sounded a little more terse than it needed to, so we encourage you to think about that in future postings. If you see a post you find highly offensive and feel you might not be able to have a constructive exchange with the individual, feel free to report it and allow the mod team to look over the post.

Seriously, thank you all for working to handle the misunderstandings amongst yourselves. It is greatly appreciated.

Please do not derail further by responding to this moderation in the thread. If you have pertinent questions regarding this, shoot me a private message.

Thinker (moderator)