[DapperButch]

Originally Posted by Converse

Having Butch friendships has always been important to me, and when I lived in England, the US and Australia, always chose locations where “community’ was strong- and often had to sacrifice much to do so.

Never in a Butch/Femme Community have I felt anything but respect shown for relationships, and much thought given to what is deemed acceptable behaviour. I have never experienced the posturing or competitive behaviour that has been mentioned here, from any group of Butches - but instead found it to be “typical” within the andro, lesbian community- where perhaps it has been my own fault for not understanding any of the protocols. Issues of everyone being everyone’s ex, friends becoming lovers becoming friends are all things that confuse me- I’m a simple person, I understand Butch/Femme dynamics- when lines get blurred, no matter how much I squint, I can’t follow the storyline.

I’m old and cranky enough to no longer tolerate lack of protocols, and for me, nothing irritates me more than a lesbian who believes that Butch is a fashion statement, and who after putting on the “butch look” proceeds to behave like an adolescent boy with his first set of car keys. Perhaps these are the “cocks” that are being discussed, I don’t know, but what I do know is that without my Butch friendships my life would have been very different.

Yep. "Butch code" is certainly not a part of the non-butch/femme lesbian community.