[WickedFemme]

Violence within intimate relationships, known as domestic or intimate partner violence, has been documented as an epidemic in the United States and worldwide17 and is defined in many different ways. For the purposes of this report, we utilize NCAVP‘s working definition of domestic/intimate partner violence: ―a pattern of behavior where one intimate partner coerces, dominates and isolates the other intimate partner in order to maintain power and control over the partner and over the relationship."18
Dynamics of Domestic/Intimate Partner Violence
Domestic/intimate partner violence can occur in dating or long-term relationships and affects all communities, regardless of race, ethnicity, economic status, age, ability, HIV status, sexual orientation, gender identity or gender expression. Power and control is the central dynamic of a relationship in which domestic/intimate partner violence occurs and patterns of abuse often escalate over time.19 Abusive partners use myriad tactics and strategies to exert and maintain control over their partners, including:

physical abuse, which can include hitting, slapping, punching, kicking, pushing, restraining, withholding food, medication or medical care;

verbal abuse, which can include insults, demeaning language, slurs and vicious personal attacks;

sexual abuse, which can include forced or non-consensual sex and verbal sexual abuse;

psychological/emotional abuse, which can include making the survivor think they are crazy, blaming the survivor for the abuse, denying or minimizing the abuse, withholding psychotropic medication or limiting access to treatment;

economic abuse, which can include limiting access to money/resources, interfering with school or work, causing the survivor to lose their job through harassment (including ―outing‖ to employers), damaging credit and identity theft;

isolation, which can include creating rifts between the survivor and their support system, cutting off access to that support system, posing as the abused partner to prevent the survivor from accessing the limited resources available and/or ―tracking‖ the survivor through service providers;

intimidation, which can include threats of violence, threats to hurt loved ones, threats to ―out‖ the survivor‘s LGBTQ

identity, HIV status, mental health issues, drug or alcohol use or other stigmatized identities or behaviors;

use of privilege, which can include incorporating biased language and slurs into verbal abuse, utilizing institutions that may be oppressive to LGBTQ survivors like the court and child welfare systems, exposing the survivor to hate violence or ―outing‖ the survivor as outlined above.20

Domestic/intimate partner violence tactics in LGBTQ relationships are similar to those used in heterosexual relationships, but also include the use of anti-LGBTQ societal stigma and bias as a central tactic to exert power and control and increase isolation.