Thread: Big Girl Love
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Old 01-18-2010, 11:49 AM   #89
hippieflowergirl
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Quote:
Originally Posted by IrishGrrl View Post
I'm glad I wasnt around to read this thread in the last few days.

The only thing I'm going to comment on is Junes post. I dont disagree persay, but I do not share your feelings about threads/spaces like this.
I feel like you were right on the money when you said that people of size are marginalized, and treated as less than. That is exactly the reason I feel we need threads/spaces like this. I dont see it being that much different than other groups who are marginalized setting up positive space for themselves.
Sometimes after a long day of being dismissed, and discrimiated against, it's nice to come to a place where I feel loved, appreciated, seen.

That's why I come here to the planet. To be appreciated and seen for WHO I am ..not WHAT I am.

xoxoxo


i DO. i want to be appreciated for WHAT i am. i'm a "fat, delicious, femme genius". (my best gay boyfriend coined the term and i love it!) i want to be appreciated for my WHAT, WHO, WHEN, WHERE and WHY. i want to be appreciated for all of me. if someone likes my WHO but not my WHAT then they dont like ME.

i want someone to like me, flaws and all. fat is not one of those flaws. a propensity to be long-winded and selfish is...but fat is not. i want to be loved because i'm flawed. loving someone who's perfect is too much work. (there's no room on the pedestal for both of you and who wants to be in a relationship with someone who doesnt understand struggle?)

i'm glad there are threads like this as well. most days anyway. i see things posted this thread that are meant to be supportive...but they really serve to remind me that it's socially acceptable to discriminate against people who dont conform to cutural weight standards.

i get so tired of being seen as "less than" because i'm booty-liscious.

i get tired of being treated as though i'm disfigured because i have round thighs and large breasts.

i get tired of people's looks of surprise when i show up on my bike or ask to be included in a hike or some other physical activity.

it irks the hell out of me when someone responds with an incredulous look when they see a flier/advertisement for a class (yoga or belly dance) i'm teaching/have taught.

why is it socially acceptable to assume (and treat me as thought) i'm completely sedentary, out of control, unhealthy, and piggish because i weigh 50 pounds more than i care to at the moment? (and no...the "appropriate maximum weight" listed for someone my height on height/weight charts is NOT my goal).

why is there a cultural assumption that i'm "lucky" or should be "grateful" if i have a lover? maybe it's the lover who is lucky!

why should anyone be judged based on something this arbitrary? i'm not raping dogs or burning babies. i'm fat. i'm not afraid of being fat. i'm not embarrassed or apologetic.

why do i want to take out an ad in every major newspaper in the world and tell the asshats to step off when i know it wont matter...to them or me...in the end?

dear haters,

i dont want to be angry at you. i dont want to give you any of my time or any space in my head. you will never be worth it. i may be fat...but you're stupid and i'd rather be me than you. stupid is ugly. fat is simply more of me...and that's always a good thing.

p.s. i dont have a "weight problem". you have a problem with my weight.


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