Originally Posted by sylvie
i've made some really big, and hard changes in my life, and am doing the hard work right now and it's difficult, but i'm celebrating some small successes.. This is why i haven't been around for a bit, though around just not "around", being active here, i guess are the right words.
i've sought out help with my eating disorder - i'm a binger...(was once binge AND purge) but for the passed 6-7 years it's been binge only... i keep falling off course with my wanting to lose weight and be healthy, because i go back to binging and i needed to get to the point where i recognized i have a real problem here and it's not only making me unhappy, but hurting my health.
what causes me to binge? stress, sadness, happiness, anger, exhaustion... in other words, many things, but sadly i pushed a lot of people out of my life both friends and family, due to the binging.. food has become my peace in life, and so i've finally taken some steps to work through this eating disorder of mine and making some changes..
1/ OA - difficult beyond belief, i've mixed feelings about this.
2/ counselling - i have 2 more sessions and then i start counselling at another level..
3/ Crisis and Coping Skills course - for panic, anxiety and relaxation & stress
4/ frequent visits with a dietician who is helping me reshape my entire food plan, way of thinking, portion control, etc.
5/ frequent online OA meetings
6/ blogging, lots of blogging...
7/ Abstinence from lots of foods and drinks i love - is my greatest challenge right now.
i have never in my life taken such steps nor wanted to, admitting i had a real problem was the biggest step i've taken until recently, and putting all of this in the works has been extremely overwhelming and emotional for me.. i 'am' proud of myself, and hope now i can really work at taking the steps i need to be a healthier, happier and thinner me!
i'm extremely lucky for Mtn in my life, He's been the most amazing support & encouragement, and literally holds me together in my weakest moments.. i have just started to tell my family who have had no idea all of these years and am finding some support through them as well..
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so my goal with all of this is to keep at my healthy eating plan, use all the wonderful tools i have in place, couple all of that with some exercise each day and really be successful at doing this!
Admitting all of this, is one of the hardest things i've had to do in these passed couple of weeks, and doing this helps me be held accountable to keep doing my work ...
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