[Nina]

I wonder if, when we are typing something into a public forum and we see ourselves typing: 'sorry, don't mean to be crude' that it might be a hint to give ourselves a moment to re-read and re-think before we hit send...

we all have differing sensibilities...this is true...I would suggest that there is a base line which we, or at least many of us, are aware of, and which when we make the conscious choice to cross, says much more about us than it does about those of us who might have a reaction...

add to that when we make it blatantly clear that we'd like to share ourselves with a special specialperson, our words become all the more important...I, for one, am much more interested in someone who saves the specifics of intimate desires for an appropriate private time and place...I would not feel safe or respected going into something having heard and read , more than once, the intimate acts which are a prerequisite for a relationship...

I say this with the full admission that I may well have a narrow, or limited view of things....I say this knowing that a certain level of decorum is both important to me and can be a form of foreplay...still. and. all.

if someone 'doesn't want to be crude' , I would suggest being more judicious in ones words, and being aware that, having made clear in the most specific of terms what one wants, it's hardly effective to repeat it...