[PinkieLee]

For me, I've spent most of my adult life overindulging. I felt like living meant doing everything on a grand scale... working hard, playing harder, living loud and loving BIG!

Some of my favorite times are being surrounded by friends at a dining room table. Sharing stories, free flowing wine, rich foods and laughter that can be heard down the streets. That is my happy place... always has been. I will throw a dinner party to celebrate ANY occassion... big or small, because I love how I feel surrounded by that energy. As much as I would like to say it nourished my body, it nourished my soul more.

I come from a family of addicts. My father is an alcoholic, my brother a meth addict, and my mother a shopoholic. I've spent my entire life trying to fix them or trying to make them happy. My safe place was always in the kitchen... making them their favorite foods, so I would have importance in their life. "Daddy, have you eaten today, let me make you some lunch", "Tim, come out of your room I made you a chocolate pie", "Mom, I made grandma's macaroni & tomato receipe... come eat with me."

Most of the time, I sat alone at the kitchen table eating the food I cooked for them. Self medicating my lonesomeness with food I made with love. I mean, I can't let all this food go to waste. Cooking for them, to nourish their bodies, was my way of showing I loved them... even if they didn't eat.