Butch Femme Planet - View Single Post

Dominique · 09-05-2011, 09:35 AM

I have never fallen out of kayak accidently, until yesterday. I have done so intentionally, while teaching kayaking to newbies. Emergency procedures
are part of recreational kayaking.

My partner and I are going to compete in a *pumpkin* race in October. A
5 k fun bicycle ride, and a kayak race. (I may run in the 10 k, not sure, and today for sure, not sure) This was my partners idea not mine.

So yesterday, as per the usual, we head out to the river to kayak at sunrise. It's been extremely hot again, and oppressively high humidity. I was happy no sun shine. The competitive side of me wants to compete and win in this kayak competition. It's rated level 1. So I had my butch
who is much stronger than I, in training. She was towing me in my kayak,
up stream. We went to our designated *break spot* I brought along
frozen grapes and blue berries and espresso. Both were in these thin
stainless steel thermos's and these great ceramic commuter mugs with rubber lids. I had them packed into a perfect kind of bag. Understand,
packing in/on a kayak is important (get your minds out of the gutter)

Our kayaks were still tethered together, and as we approached our
*break spot*, I began breaking out the break-fast treats. Instead of me untying her kayak, the smarter thing to do....as she was dropping the small
anchor, i was up on my kness, sort of, stretching all the way across the bow to untie my rope, while holding the partially broken out break-fast with one hand, and some how I lost balance-slipped and before anyone could say anything FEMME OVERBOARD.

I fell in, to my left side, so in between me and my honey, was my kayak. Now my left leg somehow became somewhat stuck as inertia was taking me overboard and breakfast was now in the river. Zip canvas bag filling with water....and I couldn't get my leg completely free (i didn't realize this
at first) until the damn kayak finally flipped first onto it's side, then completely over........at least I was out of it....and I'm watching my precious stainless steel ensemble float away filling with water and there goes our treat! So I try to swim after it. Maybe I was a tad bit in shock, thinking back to yesterday.

In my

I hear a whistle blowing. WTF? It was my lover blowing her emergency whistle. So I stop swimming, and start floating and begin to yell at her *QUIT BLOWING THAT WHISTLE>>>THAT'S FOR EMERGENCY* And she blew it again. I swam over to her kayak yelling the whole time, and I sort of remember her inquiring if I was ok....and I was mixed yelling about the espresso floating away and sinking, stop blowing that whistle, my kayak is taking on water and of all the goofy things for me to say....*The ducks poop in this water*.

Now you know, she just wanted to take the end of her kayak paddle,place it on top of my head and press, just hard enough to put my head under water to shut me up. But as I have said, she knows when to ignore me.

By this point she had a big smile on her face,(she told me later the comment about duck poop did it) and my high strung personality misconstrued that smile to be laughing at me, and I was now yelling/crying/ lump in my throat.....oh this is funny!!! as I was trying to flip her kayak. (hence total melt down)

Finally I got my brain back (after I wrapped my head around breakfast ensemble was gone) and I had to teach her how to help me empty my kayak. She had never done this before. I was trying to be patient. I was only super bitch one more time. I yelled * You're going to get wet
FU#$ing get over it* and again, in retrospect, that didn't apply as she was
very wet. I was irrational.

Finally, we got the water out of, and me back into my kayak. I paddeled back to the bicycles trying to regain my composure, but we kept the rope attached.

Last night, in the middle of the night, I said to my *sweet* honey....please tell the Kat to get off of my hip. Ha? No kat on my hip. Honey goes and gets me two advil. This morning, I can hardly walk. I feel like I tore an ass muscle. Sitting is even worse. We have a baseball game in a couple of hours. I already tried to sit on my bicycle. That was a NO. I tried to ride with out sitting, medium pain. It just started to rain. That maybe the answer. I've been standing all morning, trying to stretch this out, why can't I stand at the game?

Sweet Lover just said we are not going.

(please)
Thought I'd share. Have a safe labor day to those of us in the US!

09-05-2011, 09:35 AM	#78
Dominique Member How Do You Identify?: Female/Lesbian/half the athlete I used to be Preferred Pronoun?: she/her Relationship Status: Dates Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: So proud to be a Pittsburgher Posts: 1,484 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 2,645 Thanked 3,730 Times in 1,166 Posts Rep Power: 21474853	I have never fallen out of kayak accidently, until yesterday. I have done so intentionally, while teaching kayaking to newbies. Emergency procedures are part of recreational kayaking. My partner and I are going to compete in a pumpkin race in October. A 5 k fun bicycle ride, and a kayak race. (I may run in the 10 k, not sure, and today for sure, not sure) This was my partners idea not mine. So yesterday, as per the usual, we head out to the river to kayak at sunrise. It's been extremely hot again, and oppressively high humidity. I was happy no sun shine. The competitive side of me wants to compete and win in this kayak competition. It's rated level 1. So I had my butch who is much stronger than I, in training. She was towing me in my kayak, up stream. We went to our designated break spot I brought along frozen grapes and blue berries and espresso. Both were in these thin stainless steel thermos's and these great ceramic commuter mugs with rubber lids. I had them packed into a perfect kind of bag. Understand, packing in/on a kayak is important (get your minds out of the gutter) Our kayaks were still tethered together, and as we approached our break spot, I began breaking out the break-fast treats. Instead of me untying her kayak, the smarter thing to do....as she was dropping the small anchor, i was up on my kness, sort of, stretching all the way across the bow to untie my rope, while holding the partially broken out break-fast with one hand, and some how I lost balance-slipped and before anyone could say anything FEMME OVERBOARD. I fell in, to my left side, so in between me and my honey, was my kayak. Now my left leg somehow became somewhat stuck as inertia was taking me overboard and breakfast was now in the river. Zip canvas bag filling with water....and I couldn't get my leg completely free (i didn't realize this at first) until the damn kayak finally flipped first onto it's side, then completely over........at least I was out of it....and I'm watching my precious stainless steel ensemble float away filling with water and there goes our treat! So I try to swim after it. Maybe I was a tad bit in shock, thinking back to yesterday. In my I hear a whistle blowing. WTF? It was my lover blowing her emergency whistle. So I stop swimming, and start floating and begin to yell at her QUIT BLOWING THAT WHISTLE>>>THAT'S FOR EMERGENCY And she blew it again. I swam over to her kayak yelling the whole time, and I sort of remember her inquiring if I was ok....and I was mixed yelling about the espresso floating away and sinking, stop blowing that whistle, my kayak is taking on water and of all the goofy things for me to say....The ducks poop in this water. Now you know, she just wanted to take the end of her kayak paddle,place it on top of my head and press, just hard enough to put my head under water to shut me up. But as I have said, she knows when to ignore me. By this point she had a big smile on her face,(she told me later the comment about duck poop did it) and my high strung personality misconstrued that smile to be laughing at me, and I was now yelling/crying/ lump in my throat.....oh this is funny!!! as I was trying to flip her kayak. (hence total melt down) Finally I got my brain back (after I wrapped my head around breakfast ensemble was gone) and I had to teach her how to help me empty my kayak. She had never done this before. I was trying to be patient. I was only super bitch one more time. I yelled * You're going to get wet FU#$ing get over it* and again, in retrospect, that didn't apply as she was very wet. I was irrational. Finally, we got the water out of, and me back into my kayak. I paddeled back to the bicycles trying to regain my composure, but we kept the rope attached. Last night, in the middle of the night, I said to my sweet honey....please tell the Kat to get off of my hip. Ha? No kat on my hip. Honey goes and gets me two advil. This morning, I can hardly walk. I feel like I tore an ass muscle. Sitting is even worse. We have a baseball game in a couple of hours. I already tried to sit on my bicycle. That was a NO. I tried to ride with out sitting, medium pain. It just started to rain. That maybe the answer. I've been standing all morning, trying to stretch this out, why can't I stand at the game? Sweet Lover just said we are not going. (please) Thought I'd share. Have a safe labor day to those of us in the US!