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Cin · 09-06-2011, 02:37 PM

I don’t like to give up. Degree of difficulty for me is not a deterrent, quite the contrary. I seem to enjoy a challenge and keep at it until I’m successful. Or until I am satisfied that I never will be successful and it is in my best interest to let it go.

In theory this doesn’t sound like a character defect. However, in practice (at least the way I practice it) it really is. It is exhausting, albeit for those closest to me more than for me.

And while it is up to me how hard and how long I want to keep working at stuff, this way I have of being relentless effects my interactions with others as well. It translates into a certain doggedness that people find off putting. I am nothing if not persistent in my dealings with others. I have, more times than I care to remember, been told things like, “You’re like a dog with a bone”, “I feel like I’m being interrogated, wanna back off”, “Beat a dead horse much” and a variety of other similar sentiments. Apparently my stick-to-it- ness likes to recruit. I seem to think everyone wants to keep at something until they get it all worked out, or until they puke, whichever comes first.

I do the same thing when it comes to working through disagreements or understanding clearly exactly what someone else is trying to say to me. Or, and I am sure this is infinitely more annoying, I want to be perfectly clear regarding what I am trying to say to someone else and I want to be absolutely sure they understand. I want to keep at it until everything becomes clear. In the moment I’m so certain that everyone is invested in this.

I don’t know why I think that, since there is considerable evidence to the contrary. And it’s not like a secret I have to discover or a puzzle I have to work out, plenty of people, including my wife, have told me quite clearly (clear enough even for a clarity freak like me) that they are not interested in pursuing things until the tops of their heads explode. Yet there I am trying to make a case for why it will be fun and interesting or at least satisfying to get to the bottom of something or other. I am trying to figure out what is in it for me to keep this behavior up. I don’t understand why I can’t get it through my head nobody wants to be harassed and that’s how what I am doing feels for them. I’m really trying to not do this.

I just read this to my wife and she said and I quote “Fabulous news”.

09-06-2011, 02:37 PM	#5
Cin Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Butch Preferred Pronoun?: she Relationship Status: Truly Madly Deeply Join Date: Aug 2011 Location: In My Head Posts: 2,814 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 6,333 Thanked 10,436 Times in 2,476 Posts Rep Power: 21474851	I don’t like to give up. Degree of difficulty for me is not a deterrent, quite the contrary. I seem to enjoy a challenge and keep at it until I’m successful. Or until I am satisfied that I never will be successful and it is in my best interest to let it go. In theory this doesn’t sound like a character defect. However, in practice (at least the way I practice it) it really is. It is exhausting, albeit for those closest to me more than for me. And while it is up to me how hard and how long I want to keep working at stuff, this way I have of being relentless effects my interactions with others as well. It translates into a certain doggedness that people find off putting. I am nothing if not persistent in my dealings with others. I have, more times than I care to remember, been told things like, “You’re like a dog with a bone”, “I feel like I’m being interrogated, wanna back off”, “Beat a dead horse much” and a variety of other similar sentiments. Apparently my stick-to-it- ness likes to recruit. I seem to think everyone wants to keep at something until they get it all worked out, or until they puke, whichever comes first. I do the same thing when it comes to working through disagreements or understanding clearly exactly what someone else is trying to say to me. Or, and I am sure this is infinitely more annoying, I want to be perfectly clear regarding what I am trying to say to someone else and I want to be absolutely sure they understand. I want to keep at it until everything becomes clear. In the moment I’m so certain that everyone is invested in this. I don’t know why I think that, since there is considerable evidence to the contrary. And it’s not like a secret I have to discover or a puzzle I have to work out, plenty of people, including my wife, have told me quite clearly (clear enough even for a clarity freak like me) that they are not interested in pursuing things until the tops of their heads explode. Yet there I am trying to make a case for why it will be fun and interesting or at least satisfying to get to the bottom of something or other. I am trying to figure out what is in it for me to keep this behavior up. I don’t understand why I can’t get it through my head nobody wants to be harassed and that’s how what I am doing feels for them. I’m really trying to not do this. I just read this to my wife and she said and I quote “Fabulous news”.