Ron White: I wasn't a bright child. I had a very weak vocabulary. In fact, if I'd known the difference between "antidote" and "anecdote", my friend Bobby Schneider would still be alive today.
[laughter]
Ron White: He got bit by a copperhead, I'm reading him funny stories out of Reader's Digest.
[laughter]
Ron White: His head's starting to swell, and I like "It ain't working." He goes "read faster!"
[laughter]
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