What a great thread, and I don't know how I didn't see it until now
I have PTSD from a single event. I was severely beaten by a person I was in a relationship with and literally left for dead. I am coming up on my 12th year anniversary of surviving this event on Thanksgiving, and there is not a year that doesn't go by that I don't find myself in a"slump" during this holiday. I too have triggers, and with a lot of support and resources, I am able to identify Most of mine. As most of you feel, I am ashamed and feel an overly amount of guilt about what happened. No matter how much I "prepare" myself for the upcoming holiday and remind myself that it is the past, I still feel hopeless and helpless when the time arrives. As apocalipstic has endured, I too, will be broke out in hives before all is said and done.
I have become stronger with time. Having given myself a confidence booster with my profession, teaching myself that I truly am a strong woman. But one thing is for sure, it never will go away. I am blessed with an amazing partner who understands what I have been through and has given me the unconditional love and support to help me get stronger each and every day.