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persiphone · 11-08-2011, 12:17 AM

i don't hold grudges. i'm too lazy. i've worked very hard on out of sight out of mind and i'm so good at it that it's like autopilot. if you aren't in my life for whatever reason then i don't need to contemplate it, dwell on it, have a grudge.

i tend to cut negativity out of my life swiftly and with precision. sure there will be chances, but once those are run through i got to go cuz now you're just wasting my time. negativity drains me too quickly and it zaps the sparkle out of my step and i just don't live like that. it is my life, afterall, and i'll live it how i choose to and misery is not my destination.

i don't ask my friends to choose and my friends don't ask me to choose. i don't tapdance. i'm not the appeasing type of person. i just walk away. it's less people i have to talk to. i also will back away from friends/acquaintances that are friends with people i wouldn't be friends with, if that makes sense. i've left partners over their circles of friends. why bother?

i was let go out of a 20 year friendship when i started dating butches. somehow, my being gay was ok as long as i dated girls. i've been let go as result of partners of friends having some kind of issue with me as well and i'm ok with being let go over that cuz i would never want to deny my friends a chance at love, even if i disagree with it or don't like it. this happened to me with a best friend about a year ago. the relationship was brief and she regretted it but i couldn't go back. i'm not a go back kind of person. i'm a go forward type person. but i do miss her and i find myself struggling a little bit with that one cuz we had such a fun friendship. she texted me yesterday. i have to admit there's a tug. i haven't decided yet. with some people i can pick up where we left off if i wasn't that close with them cuz things just happen sometimes and circumstances change and whatnot. i'm not completely unreasonable. it's the close friends that i have to be more diligent about because the potential for damage is greater.

i prefer to avoid a fight. i dunno if that makes me graceful or not. i tend to just shut down and shut out. once someone has gotten me to that point there really is no getting me out of it. my life experience has taught me that people will not change and it's best to make a quick and clean cut. hashing it out for hours on end isn't going to make it different and it's probably not going to change my mind or theirs and again is just wasting my time at that point and i have my life to live with people i enjoy being around. those people don't enjoy me when i'm being dragged down and i certainly don't want to waste their time with negativity that's been placed upon me by someone else. no. so yeah...no tap dancing and no bullshit. be a quality friend or move the fuck on. cuz i certainly will.

11-08-2011, 12:17 AM	#35
persiphone Timed Out How Do You Identify?: femme Relationship Status: on a hedonistic hiatus Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Permanently Banned 12/28/2011 Posts: 462 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,574 Thanked 1,562 Times in 380 Posts Rep Power: 0	i don't hold grudges. i'm too lazy. i've worked very hard on out of sight out of mind and i'm so good at it that it's like autopilot. if you aren't in my life for whatever reason then i don't need to contemplate it, dwell on it, have a grudge. i tend to cut negativity out of my life swiftly and with precision. sure there will be chances, but once those are run through i got to go cuz now you're just wasting my time. negativity drains me too quickly and it zaps the sparkle out of my step and i just don't live like that. it is my life, afterall, and i'll live it how i choose to and misery is not my destination. i don't ask my friends to choose and my friends don't ask me to choose. i don't tapdance. i'm not the appeasing type of person. i just walk away. it's less people i have to talk to. i also will back away from friends/acquaintances that are friends with people i wouldn't be friends with, if that makes sense. i've left partners over their circles of friends. why bother? i was let go out of a 20 year friendship when i started dating butches. somehow, my being gay was ok as long as i dated girls. i've been let go as result of partners of friends having some kind of issue with me as well and i'm ok with being let go over that cuz i would never want to deny my friends a chance at love, even if i disagree with it or don't like it. this happened to me with a best friend about a year ago. the relationship was brief and she regretted it but i couldn't go back. i'm not a go back kind of person. i'm a go forward type person. but i do miss her and i find myself struggling a little bit with that one cuz we had such a fun friendship. she texted me yesterday. i have to admit there's a tug. i haven't decided yet. with some people i can pick up where we left off if i wasn't that close with them cuz things just happen sometimes and circumstances change and whatnot. i'm not completely unreasonable. it's the close friends that i have to be more diligent about because the potential for damage is greater. i prefer to avoid a fight. i dunno if that makes me graceful or not. i tend to just shut down and shut out. once someone has gotten me to that point there really is no getting me out of it. my life experience has taught me that people will not change and it's best to make a quick and clean cut. hashing it out for hours on end isn't going to make it different and it's probably not going to change my mind or theirs and again is just wasting my time at that point and i have my life to live with people i enjoy being around. those people don't enjoy me when i'm being dragged down and i certainly don't want to waste their time with negativity that's been placed upon me by someone else. no. so yeah...no tap dancing and no bullshit. be a quality friend or move the fuck on. cuz i certainly will.