[amiyesiam]

my thoughts on overeating
it happens.
It is not realistic or possible to be perfect. (if you manage it let me know 'k)

My fall back when thinking about weight issues is how do normal people eat?

Normal people: those that do not have any type of eating disorder, who eat what they want in moderation, don't obsess about food all the time, who manage a healthy weight for themselves(not necessarily thin), who are not on "diets", who don't count calories or weigh themselves all the time with out reason: (a reason would be a diabetic having to count carbs for insulin) and who can be reasonably active in their lives (based on ability, some are differently abled) and someone who stops eating when full most of the time and lastly someone who can have their favorite foods in the house without overeating them or obsessing about it.

So if my goal is to become a "normal eater" then I need to start with "normal" goals.

I am not going to expect "perfect behavior" from myself. It isn't possible so lets start with a reasonable expectations for behavior.

If, having set reasonable expectations, I globalize a mistake, (when say, you ate cookies and instead of thinking, I ate cookies, you think something along the lines of "I am a horrible person" "I hate myself" "I am a fat/ugly/disgusting person" then you are globalizing an action into what kind of person you are. This kind of thinking has to be challenged again and again. It is not healthy.

This type of global thinking happens for many people in lots of situations not just with overeating/weight loss. Sometimes, what people call self esteem I really think is having a realistic view of ones own humanity, an understanding that one will make mistakes, and having the ability to see a mistake as a mistake, not a reflection on who one is as a person. And really, if you think about it, it is really arrogant to think one can be perfect. If we all logically know no one is perfect, but then psychically slaughter ourselves when we make a mistake, are we not really saying/thinking "WE" shouldn't make mistakes? But we all have to make mistakes, why should "WE" be any different? Unless of course we, at some level, have different standards for ourselves.

If say, I hurt your feelings, I will be sorry and I will feel bad, will think about how to make sure it doesn't happen again. But no where along the line will I think I am a bad person or hate myself for making a mistake and hurting your feelings. I don't globalize my errors, except with food. I have spent 6 + months focusing and working on this area. I have made huge amounts of progress. I, (me, what I need, have to do, no one else LOL) want this last part of my head screwed on correctly.

I want to listen to my body, stop when I am full, eat when I am hungry, feel the difference between actual hunger and emotional hunger. And ya know what, if I listen and know I am hearing emotional hunger I can make a choice, I can chose to eat or not. And I can chose how much.

And another thing, cause apparently I am on a roll tonight, I can think I want something and STOP when I realize it doesn't taste good. Gosh how often do we think we want something and start eating and realize this doesn't taste so good, but we keep eating, not even liking it. Why would we eat stuff that isn't yummy? When you really stop and taste stuff so much of what you think is yummy isn't. Especially sweet stuff. So much stuff is to fatty, to sweet, to salty or just is bland with no flavor.

End of ramble!