12-20-2011, 08:45 AM
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#47
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Infamous Member
How Do You Identify?: Biological female. Lesbian.
Relationship Status: Happy
Join Date: Feb 2010
Location: Hanging out in the Atlantic.
Posts: 9,234
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Thanked 34,630 Times in 7,640 Posts
Rep Power: 21474861
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Quote:
Originally Posted by Sachita
In a perfect world it shouldnt matter, however I would not jump into a relationship with someone who had an ex lurking about. I would spend time, get to know them and move very slow. There's just been too many bad situations I've encounter to just trust someone that much right off the bat.
I look around me and see so many people just jumping in and going full speed ahead. Whats the fucking hurry? The very worse thing you can do is base a relationship on passion and allowing the HIGH's to fuel you past common sense. When reality checks in it might be more then what your bargained for. Slow down, don't settle and nurture a friendship
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This makes sense to me. Anyone still connected to an ex either by living arrangement, finances, emotions etc is not someone free to explore a relationship with another.
In my experience it takes time to heal and get back on ones feet. To try and circumvent this by jumping into another relationship does a disservice to all parties.
My general rule is a year of alone time before even considering getting involved. The head is clearer, the emotions are free, and involvement is a choice not a reactionary move to loss, lonliness etc.
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