Butch Femme Planet - View Single Post - What are your three non-negotiables (in a relationship)?

adorable · 01-25-2012, 01:13 PM

There are more non-negotiables in a relationship, but these are my top three:

Know the rules of engagement. Nothing else is attractive. My home is a sanctuary, a safe base. I have never had a relationship (after age 17) where there was fighting, intense disagreements, screaming, or even slamming of doors. (I did have a significant relationship, where, when she became very sick five years in, it resulted in some Jerry Springer like stuff – it was understandably different and not the norm for us.)

Know thyself. It’s hard to convey the importance of this or how seriously I take it. I have no desire to be your therapist, mother or boss. I don’t want to figure you out or sort through your problems. I want to be me and for you to be you. Yes, we all have issues sometimes. At this point in our lives though, we should have a good handle on our inner core – the shaky ground should be long behind us. I am a rock that can manage almost any situation. I want a fellow rock, not the person that depends on one.

Be passionate. About something. Anything. The things you can’t wait to do in your free time. Those things that you never get tired of reading about, thinking about, participating in, or fighting for. There is nothing more exciting or engaging than talking to someone that is passionate about something. I’ve had some of the most fascinating conversations with someone who writes mathematical theory that only he and four other people in the world understand. (I'm still not one of those four.) It’s mind boggling to me, but his intensity is awe inspiring. I am passionate about several things. To me those are the most authentic of human interactions. I treasure sharing them.

01-25-2012, 01:13 PM	#108
adorable Member How Do You Identify?: Sarcastically Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: Unavailable Join Date: Feb 2010 Location: Home of the Yankee's Posts: 752 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 1,708 Thanked 2,643 Times in 590 Posts Rep Power: 12725119	There are more non-negotiables in a relationship, but these are my top three: Know the rules of engagement. Nothing else is attractive. My home is a sanctuary, a safe base. I have never had a relationship (after age 17) where there was fighting, intense disagreements, screaming, or even slamming of doors. (I did have a significant relationship, where, when she became very sick five years in, it resulted in some Jerry Springer like stuff – it was understandably different and not the norm for us.) Know thyself. It’s hard to convey the importance of this or how seriously I take it. I have no desire to be your therapist, mother or boss. I don’t want to figure you out or sort through your problems. I want to be me and for you to be you. Yes, we all have issues sometimes. At this point in our lives though, we should have a good handle on our inner core – the shaky ground should be long behind us. I am a rock that can manage almost any situation. I want a fellow rock, not the person that depends on one. Be passionate. About something. Anything. The things you can’t wait to do in your free time. Those things that you never get tired of reading about, thinking about, participating in, or fighting for. There is nothing more exciting or engaging than talking to someone that is passionate about something. I’ve had some of the most fascinating conversations with someone who writes mathematical theory that only he and four other people in the world understand. (I'm still not one of those four.) It’s mind boggling to me, but his intensity is awe inspiring. I am passionate about several things. To me those are the most authentic of human interactions. I treasure sharing them.