Yep, I get told that I am lying about my head injury all the time. However, when these people "see" the Cat Scan's, and MRI's you can see the color in their faces change to bright red. They are so embarassed by their words.
I also have multiple disabilities. My diabetes is the newest one. It has plaged me for years, but I was able to maintain my weight, and the highs/lows of my blood sugars so I didn't need to have insulin, or any pills. That has changed. The endo. that I see told me that what has been happeneing is that the sugar in my body has been acting like strands of glass and ripping and tearing my body appart inside out. That is why my body takes longer to heal when I cut my foot open when I walk barefoot in the summertime. Or I get pneumonia I am on antibiotics for months. So now I have to take the diabetic pills to help my body.
I am more verbal online than in real time. It is just that what is inside comes out moreso via the computer. Too many trolls, and favoritism kill threads like this. I hope and pray this one keeps going. For example, you have those who think something is wrong with me (well, yes there is), but don't want to talk about it. Or if they understand the deficit they run the opposite way. It is fear. Like trying to understand someone talking who is severely disabled and drools as they speak.
In school I failed. I had tutors, but no real help in getting me thru school. Today if you had me in school, I still would fail. I hated school. Just the memories of it give me a bad taste in my mouth. When folks talk about going to their high school reunions, I refuse to go. Why do I want to see the fruits of others successes, and families who bend over backwards to help their kids out, when all I could do was keep from drownding. Life is not fair. I learned that the hard way.
Now as I am aging, my disabilities are getting worse, and more visable. For example, my seizures. They are becoming more intense and longer.
The one thing that really upsets me to no end are the people who are corporate hotshots. We all know them. The ones who "talk" about being ceo of their family's insurance company, or the people who travel all over the world for certain companies to advertise xyz, or the ones who start up their new ventures, and so the list grows and grows. I am happy for these folks. Truely I am. But it is very hard to swollow someones glory when I am sitting in physical pain, and I can't verbally express it. It is isolating.
I just hope and pray nobody feels the isolation that I do. It is hell.
Andrew
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