Quote:
Originally Posted by Chancie
For me, these are two different questions, whether I would get married, if full equal legal marriage were available to same sex couples, and whether I believe in serious lifelong commitment.
I can't imagine being with anyone but Pete, and maybe we'll make a public commitment in front of our familes and close friends, but even in Massachusetts, there are only limited legal protections. I miss her like crazy when we are apart during the week, but sometimes I think, What the hell would I do if she were here when I got home from work and all I want to do is drink seltzer and watch The Big Bang Theory. Next door sounds great to me.
My ex and I used to say that we wanted to be together forever, one day at a time, but by the time she fell out of love with me, she wasn't much interested in working towards a healthy loving end to our ten year relationship. Our commitment ceremony predated same sex marriage in Massachusetts, and I was put in the position of having to hire a lawyer to protect my financial interests in the home we bought and lived in together.
I know it's not a popular idea, but I see same sex marriage as offering legal and contractual protection and as a civil rights issue, but not a measure of true commitment to a relationship.
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A lot of very good points.
If someone no longer wants to work and make the marriage a living thing, no piece of paper is going to keep them there.
I really wish that we as a whole were better at fighting for our basic civil rights so that "marriage" would not be the focus of the struggle to earn an equal playing field in jobs/housing/basic human dignity.