[Linus]

Hey Braedon,

I came out to my family in a mass email. It was the best way to hit so many family members (we're kinda spread out between the US and Canada). The closest family members (my mom's relatives) were, for the most part, open and supportive even if they didn't understand it all. My grandmother was dead set against it and swore she'd never refer to me other than my birth name but still loved me.

A cousin of mine (were the same age) was very supportive. We have similar queer backgrounds and she said it made sense. An aunt of mine who is only a few years older than me was supportive enough to go to a support group to understand. She and my other aunt both said it would take some time to get used to (which I agree with since they've been used to calling me something one way for nearly 37 years -- at the time I came out).

My father and his wife never responded and seemed to have started to ignore me. This is kinda fine since we never were close and didn't meet until I was in my late teens. They are both lower case "c" conservative Christian types (he **LOVES** Harper and thinks he and Bush are awesome! --- that should tell you lots about him). It's kinda sad as I miss out on half of my family but..

As time has passed, things have changed. My aunt and her now-husband got married last summer and wanted to ask me to be their best man at their wedding. At this same wedding my grandmother called me by my chosen name. She looked at me and said, "you're happy.. that's all I ever need to know.".

Now, it hasn't been without other challenges. My half sister (my mom's second daughter) was born with a variety of aliments and mental challenges. As a result, my aunt (the oldest of my mom's siblings) asked that I not use my chosen name with my sister as she likely won't comprehend all this (she was born with schizophrenia and slight mental disability -- not quite Down's but close). This is something I respect and when I send gifts, I use my birth name. There are some battles that are ok to give up on because it doesn't affect me in the long run. I do know that I will never see her again in person because of the physical changes but I know that she is happy in her world and if she remembers me the way I was and is ok with that, then that's a good thing.