02-18-2012, 06:20 AM
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#1125
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Guest
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Quote:
Originally Posted by FtMGuyLondon
This is going to be a tough time as you well know , I suggest if you dont mind, drink lots of water it really does help get the crap out of your body I tell the guys the same thing before and after surgery it helps get all the crap out of your system, also SLEEP your body needs to heal it needs some TLC from you!
Be nice to your self and be patient!
you are doing great ya only need to worry about today not tomorrow or yeserday just today!
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Day 19
Cheers for your experience and encouragement Guy. It is getting a little tougher as the initial 'honeymoon' of being sober wears off a little and the reality of life kicks in and I still wanna play the addict avoidance game.
I don't think I could physically drink any more liquid than I am already doing. Fizzy water, tea, decaff tea, rooibos, decaff coffee (with evaporated milk to make it creamy)...night time I have a change and drink diet tonic water with a little grapefruit cordial until I go back to decaff tea and water in the couple of hours before bed. I feeling like I'm swimming from the inside in bloody liquids...and I'm never off the loo - one in, one out! 
Playing the avoidance game whilst sober is odd. I can still beat myself up about it but I remember the 'beating' the next day .gif "Say What?") At the moment I'm avoiding writing one of the essays I'm meant to be catching up with from last semester; the one I've had several benders over. I'm being very successful at that avoidance too. I'm also avoiding dealing with some official stuff that will have ramifications if I don't get on with it and then I can cry 'Poor me' when it comes crashing down round my ears. Bloody numpty!!
My daft addict brain is pinging all over the place and driving me nuts, it just won't settle down to concentrate on anything. Something else to beat myself up about because I'm gonna have to re-negotiate all my extensions at uni. I hope they understand.
As to sleep: I've been insomniac for a couple of years now but I'm coming to realize that it probably wasn't man-0-pausal insomnia as I thought but bloody booze insomnia...sitting chatting (talking crap you'll never remember) on the internet and wine goes together wonderfully. I'm now trying to give myself a daily curfew for stopping chatting and getting myself in bed to chill with either crap telly or with Radio 4. I'm getting better at this as the days go on and haven't had too many nights that have gone past 2am, which is what I used to do every night. Last night I was very good and switched my computer off at 12.30 and slept until 10am this morning. Probably the longest sleep I've had since I was on detox meds. ...and I'm still knackered but that will change with patience and time.
I'm trying hard to be patient but I'm an addict and patience with myself is not my strongest point. I keep trying though and that's the important thang.
So, after all that waffle; Today and just for today I'm grateful to be alive and sober 
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