[Gemme]

Originally Posted by SoNotHer

Some great posts have "come" in, and EnderD 503 has inspired me to stir the honey pot, so to speak, here again.

So here's a sampling from a delightfully robust website full of the euphemisms. Top favorites of mine include Flute Solo, Yank the Crank, Manual Override and Choke the Sheriff and Wait for the Posse to Come, which makes me smile ear to ear.

MALE MASTURBATION


Backstroke Roulette
Bash the Candle
Beat Off
Beat the Bishop
Beat the Dummy
Beat the Meat
Beat the Stick
Bleed the Weed
Blow Your Load
Bludgeon the Beefsteak
Bop the Baloney
Box the Jesuit
Buff the Banana
Burp the Worm
Butter the Corn
Choke the Chicken
Choke the Sheriff and Wait for the Posse to Come
Clean Your Rifle
Crank the Shank
Crown the King
Cuff the Carrot
Diddle
Drain the Monster
Fist Fuck
Fist Your Monster
Five Against One
Flog the Dog
Flog the Hog
Flog Your Dong
Flute Solo
Fondle the Fig
Gallop the Antelope
Give It a Tug
Grease the Pipe
Hack the Hog
Hand Job
Hand Work
Have It Off
Hitchhike Under the
Big Top
Hump Your Hose
Jackhammer
Jack Off
Jazz Yourself
Jerk Off
Jerk the Gherkin
Lope the Mule
Make the Bald Man Puke
Manipulate the Mango
Manual Override
Milk the Lizard
Mount a Corporal and Four
Nerk Your Throbber
Oil the Glove
Onan's Olympics
One-Man Show
Pack Your Palm
Paddle the Pickle
Paint the Pickle
Paint the Ceiling
Please Your Pisser
Plunk Your Twanger
Pocket Pinball
Pocket Pool
Polish the Rocket
Polish the Sword
Pound Off
Pound Your Flounder
Pound Your Pud
Pull Off
Pull the Pole
Pull the Pope
Pull the Pudding
Pull Your Prick
Pull Your Taffy
Pump the Python
Ram the Ham
Ride the Great White Knuckler
Rope the Pony
Rub Off
Shag
Shaking Hands With the Unemployed
Shine Your Pole
Shootin' Putty At the Moon
Slakin' the Bacon
Slammin' the Salmon
Slam the hammer
Slam the Spam
Slappin' Pappy
Slapping the Clown
Sling the Jelly
Snap the Monkey
Snap the Rubber
Snap the Whip
Soldier's Joy
Spank the Frank
Spank the Salami
Squeeze the Lemon
Stroking it
Stroke Off
Stroke the Dog
Stroke Your Poker
Take Yourself in Hand
Tease the Weenie
Tenderize the Meat
The Five-Knuckle Shuffle
Thump the Pump
Tickle Your Pickle
Toss Off
Tweak Your Twinkle
Varnish the Flagpole
Visiting Rosie Palm And Her Five Daughters
Walk the Dog
Wank
Wax the Carrot
Wax the Dolphin
Whack Off
Whip Off
Whip the Dummy
Whip the Wire
Whip Your Dripper
Whizzin' Jizzum
Wonk Your Conker
Work Off
Wrestle the Eel
Wring Out Your Rope
Yang Your Wang
Yank Off
Yank the Crank
Yank the Plank
Yank the Yam
Yank Your Strap

http://www.uta.fi/FAST/GC/sex-scat.html

How can that list have 'snap the monkey' but not 'spank the monkey'?

Revolt!