[JustJo]

Hello everyone,

Talked to mom yesterday. She's glad to be home, but finding herself exhausted and unable to do much of anything. She's still having trouble eating, as well as much nausea. They're increasing her TPN again....from 12 hours on/ 12 off to 16 on / 8 off. She says her weight is stable....but I have my doubts.

The lesions on her liver are progressing rapidly and the oncologist wants her to begin an entirely new kind of chemo with drugs she has never been on before. His summary was that her body might be able to tolerate it and, if it can, the chemo might put the liver lesions into remission.

That feels like a lot of "mights" to me, but there are no other alternatives. If this chemo doesn't work, or if she refuses it, then she has 4 to 8 months left. This is the first time they've given her a specific number. She has decided to try it in hopes that different drugs will be more tolerable, but isn't counting on it given her experience with chemo so far.

She talking to realtors about listing her house for sale, meeting with her executor, donating odds and ends, cleaning out drawers and closets, and basically getting things squared away.

I've reiterated my offer for her to come back here, whenever she wants and for as long as she wants, including to the end. I know it means a lot to her to have the offer, but I have the feeling she won't be taking me up on it. She doesn't want Rooster to see her at the end.

I keep reminding myself that she's lived longer than anyone expected several times....after all, the first time they told her she didn't have long was 42 years ago. She defied everyone's expectations then, and again 8 years ago, and again when she survived this latest surgery. Unfortunately 50+ years of Crohn's disease takes an incredible toll on the body.