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Old 03-14-2012, 09:22 AM   #158
Melissa
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Originally Posted by Quintease View Post
I think it's been really interesting.

There isn't a lot of help out there for a girl dating a transman regardless of her ID. My husband and I have come up against a lot of weird reactions, from lesbians who think I should leave the lesbian community to straight people who think I have no 'right' to call myself gay. At least I have the benefit of 17 years of queer culture. Aside from a willingness to fall in love, what does this girl have? The least she should expect is that her friends are able to offer her advice from an educated place.

There should be more discussions like this.


I have also found it very interesting. I have also found a lot of transphobia directed at both me and my husband including from friends who now view me as having crossed over to the dark side of heterosexuality or view Rufus and all ftms as somehow betraying women or the queer community. I think having been in the queer community for many years, knowing many trans identified people, ftms, mtfs over the years made Rufus' transition smooth for me. The straight woman who is the subject of this thread didn't have any of that. I think her friends kitten and Deviant Daddy are trying to help her and I commend them for that. I think a lot of partners of ftms may end up feeling isolated especially if they get negative reactions from friends and family. The fact is that partners do go through a transition period too, especially if the transition happens during a relationship.

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