Quote:
Originally Posted by Nadeest
Labels can definitely be useful, but......... we have to remember that they are only general descriptions and not fully accurate.
As far as marriage goes, that produces legal and financial advantages that we are being denied, though straight people are not. This, to my mind, is wrong.
There are other things that we need, as a culture, though, that have been denied to us, this is absolutely certain. We shouldn't be subject to being fired or harrassed, simply because of our orientation or gender status. Nor should we have to put up with discrimination anywhere, because of this. Unfortunately, we still get this in our lives, and it is totally wrong. This needs to be changed.
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It is wrong, but I also think it has to do with the American system. In Canada, there are virtually no financial/legal benefits that married couples get that unmarried couples cannot have. A few years before same-sex marriage laws were passed in Canada, same-sex couples were ruled to be able to have the same rights as other couples. Marriage then becomes largely personal, ceremonial and about expressing a legal "commitment" to a relationship.
I see the single-minded focus on the marriage issue that's happening in the US right now as one that does not benefit some of the most marginalised folks within the queer and trans communities in the same way that focusing on raising awareness and legal protection from discrimination and harassment would. If you look at why many say the marriage rights struggle in the US is important, and then look at the queer/trans community in Canada, I think it becomes clear how same-sex marriage really isn't just a gateway into working on more queer/trans rights.
Same-sex marriage has been legal for years here, and all it's done is produce a false idea in the heads of many L/G folks and straight folks that lgbt rights struggles are over because people can marry. Most of those folks don't much care about homophobia still occurring in many communities and environments in the city, about racism, transphobia, sex worker rights, the rights of those who are differently abled and how they experience homophobia or transphobia differently.
It produces this mentality, which is still pretty popular in the gaybourhood, today:
http://www.thegridto.com/city/sexual...-of-a-new-gay/
That's why I think that, yeah, marriage should be equal like all rights should be equal...but it's really not the most important rights issue facing a heck of a large chunk of the lgbt community, imo.
Edit: that and I still think it privileges a certain idea of "family" and "relationship," that is based on a whole bunch of "isms." Even if poly marriages were to be legalised, we still need to deal with the fact of how it is abused by straight religious people, who just want more ways to abuse women within the "sanctity" of marriage. Beyond legal commitment, in a world where married couples are not privileged over unmarried couples, the reasons for marriage become fewer and fewer, imo. Plus it is also about what IslandScout was saying, which basically creates social pressure to marry as though it is the only logical end to a relationship.