[Ginger]

Originally Posted by ScandalAndy

These days I find myself reluctant to mention those aspects of myself because I feel it invalidates my femme identity. Does fixing a flat tire in heels make me less of a femme? I'm not sure, but I am certainly insecure about it. It's just another thing that causes some of my hetero friends to be reminded that I am "other" than them.

Scandal, You are the boss of your own identity.

If fixing a flat tire feels outside your identity comfort range, that's one thing.

But if fixing a flat tire makes you feel vulnerable to judgment by others—whether they are LGBT or BF folks policing the boundaries of gender expression, or straight people policing the boundaries of what is "other"—the problem is THEM, not you.

Life is hard enough, when we have our identity as home base.

Not even having that, is a kind of homelessness, like not having a place to regroup, lick our wounds, rest, rejuvenate and get centered, so we go out again to face the world.