i'm sure it can work both ways. a butch can be offensive with words, and a femme can also. a femme can ask a butch do something that has been generated from the hetero female brain.
if i seem defensive, maybe i am a little lol.

i just don't think this is a butch problem. but rather a person problem. and i personally am not fond of looking to other people to guide me/correct me in regards to behaviour. if i am in need of someone to tell me how to act, i have person problem issues lol.
all is understood that it is needed to tell someone if they say things that are offensive. indeed. and that's what makes a good topic, ... learning.