[sylvie]

A few things..

- The loss of my Memere on June 24th.. Travelling there to celebrate her love & life surrounded by my wonderful family for a week, who i love so dearly. She would have been smiling upon us, she always loved family get togethers. She was such a amazing spirit, kind-hearted woman and beautiful soul. And i am blessed to have had her in my life, and to have been so close to her. i miss her with everything i have in me, but i know she's not suffering anymore - she made everyone smile right to her last breaths.. Hearing the stories of her last moments, and knowing this was what she needed, to be free from the cancer... She's at peace, at last. i love you Memere, so SO much...xox

- School is coming fast, and working a plan through my work which will keep me with minimal cost and not having a huge loan to pay... Not to mention, my work giving me a 1000$ scholarship towards my loan, i feel so grateful for the love & support of all who are backing me on my decision to go back to school to take Nursing.. Everything is confirmed, and now i sit back and am getting excited, indeed but also so nervous.. 39 years old, and finally taking my life back one step at a time..BIG step to take - But planning to put everything into this and do fabulous! Because i know i CAN.

- My recovery has been difficult the last couple of weeks.. i've broken my abstinence - because this passed year i have been physically abstinent but not mentally, spiritually & emotionally. i thought i could do it on my own, without doing the hard work and without digging through the things i stuff within for years and years.. i've learned i cannot do it alone, i now have my sponsor, and am taking steps to be more honest with myself about my compulsive eating. Working on self-acceptance and not self-abusing anymore.. Working on a lot of things.. Overwhelming, but necessary. i really *am* powerless over food, i really can't do this by myself. i'm scared of the days to come, i am struggling more than i ever have.. one foot forward, one step at a time.

- my wonderful Daddy. Always by my side, no matter what, as i am with Him. i truly am so blessed, because no matter what Our days consist of, We are supportive, present and always making time for one another. He makes me feel so loved, each and everyday and lets me know just how important i am to Him. And the fact He feels i represent Him/Us so well, & loving the opportunities to know the people in His life, as We blend Our lives together. i feel so grateful to know them, and that He wants me to be a part of their life as much as His.. Our growing family, full of love & a lifetime of happiness to come.. How can i not feel like such a blessed babygirl.. Appreciating small things, embracing life's moments together, sharing smiles & always celebrating Our love together.. i love You Daddy, so much from the bottom of my heart.. thank You for always protecting me, taking care of me and loving me.. ♥

- Lastly, much love to all my friends here.. ♥