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Old 03-09-2010, 06:41 PM   #32
Beau
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Wink I'll always dance with you

Quote:
Originally Posted by Metropolis View Post
Before I came to online B-F forums five+ years ago... I was just "butch" (Stone but it's beside the point), it was good enough, no need to say anymore. My butchness was sure as hell never questioned just because I was a female. Sometimes now I feel like I've allowed myself to get caught up in a trap (feeling caged) of having to "ID" and thus ending up in the position then of defending "it"... rather than just being... I don't like it. I'm a butch and female it's just what it is and always has been.

It's like... so- the- fuck- what?

The "Female ID'd" always felt more a response to the politics here more than expressing anything specific or different about myself as a butch. It's always felt redundant (for me like wet identified water) and it feels counter productive because (to me) it's reinforcing the politics. I don't think my butchness has to be qualified or categorized, I don't like doing it, I don't live life like a "Female ID'd Butch"... but rather a "Butch" identified female. If that makes sense to anyone but me.
Of course it makes sense -- "butch" identified female -- so, no worries there. That said, it would be lovely if we could all be "just butch", but that's sort of the point isn't it? In this arena, there are categories and categories within categories, and so on. And this arena is where we're all posting.

Quote:
Originally Posted by Metropolis View Post
"Just butch" and it felt good yep (you reminded me of that thank you)... I don't like the ID/labels politics game. I don't have to play. I'm not stepping down from the "politics" of being a "Strong Female and/or Women Butch in a Patriarchal World", just stepping away from the "ID'd" part... and the feeling pressured to stick a gender type identifier on my head and be commended or ridiculed over it (me). And I'm stepping up (back) to where I think I need to be to be happy as a butch and a female.

From here on out I identify as not identifying, just a Butch and female.

Am I being a bad ally to my fellow women? I don't think so... I'm not in any way renouncing being a female... just dropping a gender/sex based ID system I think is flawed and I believe counter productive for myself and many butches.

It works for some just not for me... anymore.

Metropolis
You're an ally to all who know you, Met. However, though the system is flawed, it seems to matter in a world that now encompasses the categories aforementioned. And yes, hell yes, it is counterproductive for many of us, myself included. But, I have concerns, Met. I worry that if there is an abdication of claiming female/woman proudly, it sends the wrong message to those who've yet to discover or evolve into an identity that is best for them. If they don't see some of us (not saying you have to) stand up and proclaim, I'm a woman, and it's okay to be a big, badass butch and be a woman - even if that doesn't match what society (any society) defines as woman - then they may not view it as being perceived as accepted or admired. It seems to play into the notion of male = superior and female = doesn't matter.

:: shrug :: I'm not sure what the answer is then for those of us who'd love to be viewed as "just butch" among our own.



Quote:
Originally Posted by Metropolis View Post
*I'll probably end up with an empty dance card but what the hay*
Now, you know that'll never be true, you heartthrob.
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