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spritzerJ · 09-05-2012, 04:10 AM

Yesterday I was able to name a quirk about a co worker that is driving me nuts. It is such a simple thing to name this quirk and I think my ability to respond to it appropriately will save us both quite a bit of misunderstanding.

The thing she does is try to get help with her workload (which I am happy to consider doing and we've talked about it) by not asking but telling. She says, "I was just thinking you would...." or "It only makes sense if you do...." and "I just can't do this and since you are there too..." And since she is very literal if I say "okay... let's talk about that" or "that might work" she considers the matter settled.

Now I know to set a time to think and come back to it explicitly. Or even better I can say something that highlights her asking. I am not sure how to do that. I just know that a couple of us are starting to get irritated and we are keeping positive this year.

09-05-2012, 04:10 AM	#124
spritzerJ Timed Out - Permanent How Do You Identify?: Queer (gender), female (biological marker) Preferred Pronoun?: she will work as a default. Relationship Status: engaged to jac until 8/10/14 Join Date: Nov 2010 Location: Maine Posts: 3,154 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,307 Thanked 15,802 Times in 2,905 Posts Rep Power: 0	Yesterday I was able to name a quirk about a co worker that is driving me nuts. It is such a simple thing to name this quirk and I think my ability to respond to it appropriately will save us both quite a bit of misunderstanding. The thing she does is try to get help with her workload (which I am happy to consider doing and we've talked about it) by not asking but telling. She says, "I was just thinking you would...." or "It only makes sense if you do...." and "I just can't do this and since you are there too..." And since she is very literal if I say "okay... let's talk about that" or "that might work" she considers the matter settled. Now I know to set a time to think and come back to it explicitly. Or even better I can say something that highlights her asking. I am not sure how to do that. I just know that a couple of us are starting to get irritated and we are keeping positive this year.