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girl_dee · 10-30-2012, 07:25 AM

Just thoughts on the evolution of *woman*, all genders of women. Over the years women have been told what a real woman does, and sadly even by other women. We've been judged and torn apart, all the while trying to do the right thing.

So basically in the beginning..

1) Tend to the farmhouse, feed the chickens, birth lots of babies, bake the biscuits, scrub the laundry, help in the fields (sometimes in the same day as birthing a baby) and read the bible to the babies by the coal oil light. Don't buck the husband and do as you are told. That's what a real woman does.

2) Graduate high school, marry the perfect man, please him, take care of him, birth the babies and take care of them while hubby is at the office. Make sure you've got the supper on the table and in your nice dress and pearls when he returns.. (June Cleaver).. "stand by your man " kinda thing...Be happy, make the best of it and be grateful.
That's what a real woman does.

3) Get a job! Womens liberation yaknow! Work outside the home like the men do. Get paid, not as much but be happy you have a job. Work all day and come home like the men do, oh by the way, also do all the things in #2. Figure out how to get the kids and hubby fed within minutes at the end of your work day. Spend the weekends cleaning and cooking to get ready for that work week. That's what a real woman does.

4) What the hell are you doing working and leaving the kids at day care? No good mom does this, Stay home and raise those kids! Forget the job and life outside the home, your job is to raise kids and take care of the house. You are not a good mom if you work and have kids in day care. That's what a real woman does.

i have never seen men subjected to such standards. Their "role" has pretty much stayed the same. Man is the dominant force. Women not so much.

That's how i feel the evolution of *woman* has played out over the years. i wonder has anyone ever bothered to say *let a woman decide what is best for her and her kids* without judgment? Nope, conform or be judged.

What is NOT brought up is what happens when Dad is a deadbeat and they have no choice but to work and leave kids in the care of someone else? What happens when the husband is abusive and she is scared to venture outside the home? What if she is trapped? What if the woman is queer? She was expected to marry a man without consideration of her identity. (my mother). It didn't matter as long as she did what was expected. Many times women have no option for what they do, yet they are still judged.

i am sick of women try to explain, and be judged as to why they do what they do because it doesn't meld with society's idea of a real woman at any given time. Hell we weren't even allowed to wear slacks in the beginning! We have had to fight for our rights and privileges since the beginning. We have been shamed into feeling pregnancy was something to be ashamed of (not allowed on TV during June Cleaver's run). Women didn't swear or get dirty. All because men said it wasn't proper.

When i was 12 my mother went and got a job. My father nearly came unglued. He showed up at her work and harassed her every day. Of course this was after 13 years of abuse, so it was to be expected.

10-30-2012, 07:25 AM	#202
girl_dee Practically Lives Here How Do You Identify?: Femme Preferred Pronoun?: dee Relationship Status: Hitched up Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: Livin’ the Dream Posts: 24,079 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 30,560 Thanked 54,832 Times in 13,908 Posts Rep Power: 21474873	i've been pondering.. Just thoughts on the evolution of woman, all genders of women. Over the years women have been told what a real woman does, and sadly even by other women. We've been judged and torn apart, all the while trying to do the right thing. So basically in the beginning.. 1) Tend to the farmhouse, feed the chickens, birth lots of babies, bake the biscuits, scrub the laundry, help in the fields (sometimes in the same day as birthing a baby) and read the bible to the babies by the coal oil light. Don't buck the husband and do as you are told. That's what a real woman does. 2) Graduate high school, marry the perfect man, please him, take care of him, birth the babies and take care of them while hubby is at the office. Make sure you've got the supper on the table and in your nice dress and pearls when he returns.. (June Cleaver).. "stand by your man " kinda thing...Be happy, make the best of it and be grateful. That's what a real woman does. 3) Get a job! Womens liberation yaknow! Work outside the home like the men do. Get paid, not as much but be happy you have a job. Work all day and come home like the men do, oh by the way, also do all the things in #2. Figure out how to get the kids and hubby fed within minutes at the end of your work day. Spend the weekends cleaning and cooking to get ready for that work week. That's what a real woman does. 4) What the hell are you doing working and leaving the kids at day care? No good mom does this, Stay home and raise those kids! Forget the job and life outside the home, your job is to raise kids and take care of the house. You are not a good mom if you work and have kids in day care. That's what a real woman does. i have never seen men subjected to such standards. Their "role" has pretty much stayed the same. Man is the dominant force. Women not so much. That's how i feel the evolution of woman has played out over the years. i wonder has anyone ever bothered to say let a woman decide what is best for her and her kids without judgment? Nope, conform or be judged. What is NOT brought up is what happens when Dad is a deadbeat and they have no choice but to work and leave kids in the care of someone else? What happens when the husband is abusive and she is scared to venture outside the home? What if she is trapped? What if the woman is queer? She was expected to marry a man without consideration of her identity. (my mother). It didn't matter as long as she did what was expected. Many times women have no option for what they do, yet they are still judged. i am sick of women try to explain, and be judged as to why they do what they do because it doesn't meld with society's idea of a real woman at any given time. Hell we weren't even allowed to wear slacks in the beginning! We have had to fight for our rights and privileges since the beginning. We have been shamed into feeling pregnancy was something to be ashamed of (not allowed on TV during June Cleaver's run). Women didn't swear or get dirty. All because men said it wasn't proper. When i was 12 my mother went and got a job. My father nearly came unglued. He showed up at her work and harassed her every day. Of course this was after 13 years of abuse, so it was to be expected.