[Spirit Dancer]

Sharing In Ceremony
Modern Uses for the Native American Talking Stick
We all want to be heard, to be able to speak freely without interruption and voice our opinions without fear of judgment. The talking stick has assured Native Americans a means of just and impartial hearings for centuries.

The ceremonial talking stick is used commonly in council circles to designate who has the right to speak. While some nations may use a feather, peace pipe, or some other sacred instrument, the object commands the respect of all. The holder of the talking stick may speak as long as they want while everyone else remains silent and listens respectfully. In honoring the power of words, the speaker, is expected to speak truthfully, from the heart. If the speaker feels they cannot honor the talking stick with words, they should refrain from speaking so as not to dishonor themself.

People of all cultures and ethnicities have embraced the simple power of the talking stick. Educators use the talking stick to assure every student free speech. It is a particularly useful tool in conflict management. When everyone has a chance to speak without interruption, it helps to defuse heated arguments, over-talking, and shouting.

Although talking sticks are traditionally made with feathers and cured leather, you can make your own by gathering an interesting looking stick from your yard and decorating it with good intentions. What it looks like is less important than the importance you give it while making it.

Around the campfire, the talking stick is often passed to share stories. One person starts the story and then passes the stick for the next person to continue, until the stick comes full circle. It's important however, particularly with children, that anyone who wishes to "pass the stick" and not talk, be given the same respect as the speakers.

The talking stick even has found a place in corporate circles, serving as an equalizer where executives and workers are given equal time and respect. Workers are able to learn new ways to communicate with each other, identify barriers that prevent them from being a high performing team and to create their vision for the future.

In the home, couples and families might keep the talking stick in a convenient place such as the family room or dinning room where it serves as a reminder to speak honestly and listen respectfully. In addition to helping resolve conflicts, the talking stick can be brought out to encourage the sharing of happy thoughts, memories, and to help with healing.