Quote:
Originally Posted by Ms. Meander
I agree that kissing is an act of intimacy. An act of intimacy that is important to me and I enjoy greatly. Most people I'm talking to agree that one does not kiss their play partners. Makes sense to me. But it seems to get more tricky when it comes to multiple intimate relationships, as you are noticing, yourself. If there are rules around kissing they often have to do with keeping that particular act between primaries. I understand this too.
When I'm thinking of myself in relation to this topic I have a lot of questions. First, I don't know what kind of relationship structure will ultimately work best for me. What if I decide not to pursue a primary relationship of my own and am content to be the second or third to others -- and then they all have agreements only to kiss their primaries? Who do I get to kiss? Obviously there are potential solutions to this but these are the sorts of questions that pop up.
I find it useful to hear other people's thoughts and experiences as I form my understandings and opinions on these topics. I thank you all for playing along!
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Actually Ms. Meander I think you are going about this the right way. I sure wish I had access to a site like this and others with different experiences when I first discovered Poly relationships.
At least you have questions and are trying to find answers to them for you and the type of relationship you may get into. I have found it is easier and better to have the answer to my questions before I get into the situation. As long as I keep in mind that each relationship is different and I may have over looked a possible answer. That is why communication, open and honest communication, is always key. Even with the who to kiss question...as my relationships change I continue the communication so that needs are being met or hopefully met.
I thank you for asking the questions...it helps me know where I stand today compared to years ago when I began this process.