Maybe I can rephrase or add to my comment and say, it requires a *specific* type of negotiation and openness. For all involved parties to be agreeable, it's negotiation x (however many) and some say, "the more the merrier" and other say, "sheesh I can't even keep up with one." It goes without saying for me, that without openness and communication, it's gonna fail. But when I fail, it's because I look the other way when I know goddamned well what's going on. That's my biggest failure. It's not consensual, it's not discussed, and it ends up festering. And what's my part in that? It's a weakness because I just let it beat me down until I give up. Instead of it being a love that lifts me up, it's a drain that saps my energy. Then I become less willing to lift the other in love, because I'm feeling cheated. It's a vicious circle.
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Originally Posted by The_Lady_Snow
See and *I* think that any kind of relationship requires alot of negotiation, open communication, transparency and discussions.. I don't see how this only pertains to poly. All of my relationships be they friendships, lovers, friends, fuck buddies, one night stands, etc are going to be clear and open.. This to *me* leads to a happier time and well keeps things from turning into something ugly..
Now, not everyone can do this because for someone unknown reason, lying, playing games and smoke and mirrors sounds better than all the above... Why? I dunno guess we should look deep in the mirror and ask ourselves why...
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