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Kenna · 04-01-2010, 01:52 PM

Truly, I think this has become a case of "being taken advantage of"....

After coming home from dad's funeral (with the exhausting travel headaches and being torn up about having to leave my brother and 2 nieces behind) I have been promptly, nearly every day, bombarded by the young, very able-bodied neighbor to be her "taxi" (this went on before the funeral too), so I posted a HUGE sign that says DO NOT DISTURB on my front door...(with some text explaining that I respectfully needed some rest and not to disturb unless it's urgent)... To be honest, I got tired - after already being exhausted - of this neighbor ringing the door bell several times a day to take her to work or other places (both her jobs are less than 2 miles away and we are on a bus route plus her family lives less than 4 blocks away)...

I certainly DON'T mind helping people out and I have always been very proud to be an "old fashioned" helpful, caring neighbor that believes in the kind of community where everyone helps out their neighbors, no matter how small the favor or how inconvenient it may be.

But for some reason, for the very first time in my life, a neighbor is REALLY starting to annoy me on a regular basis (maybe it's the overwhelming grief and heartache I've been through that has worn me down?) and for the very first time EVER, I have said NO to a neighbor.

After posting the DO NOT DISTURB UNLESS URGENT sign, she rang the door bell 3 days ago and handed me 2 pieces of my mail (I have a mail slot in my door)... (I have told her time and time again NOT to ring the door bell because the dogs go OFF... to knock instead.) She then stood around chatting about NOTHING but her mail and wouldn't make eye contact... then she finally said, "I was gonna ask for a ride to work, but I saw your sign."...Mind you, this was a VERY sunny day that many people would have enjoyed the very short hike to Outback Steakhouse where she works...I told her I had just taken my prescription pain pills that I can't drive with...she said "are you sure?"... I got this cross/serious look on my face and then she stood there hemming and hawing about the items she got in the mail again...then left.

Today, my sign is still up and I was enjoying a quiet, peaceful day soaking up the sunshine in my new "work from home office".... I nearly jumped outa my skin when she rang the door bell SEVERAL TIMES quickly... Willy went OFF so bad I had to lock him in the crate (I've tried so hard to break him of this)... I knew who it was. She asked for a ride to the grocery store "to get chicken". While I was trying to control BOTH dogs (who normally are the sweetest dogs EVER, but growl, snarl and snap at her)... I was privately thinking "CAN'T YOU READ? DON'T YOU HAVE ANY RESPECT FOR SOMEONE WHO IS RECENTLY GRIEVING A LOSS? ARE YOU FOR REAL? NOW SERIOUSLY, THIS IS OVER THE TOP!!" .... it's another REALLY beautiful day out and I know for a fact that she is very able-bodied... I told her "No, I have a new job working from home and I can't leave the phones." She says "not even for a couple minutes?" ... inside me, I start to growl!! just like Willy!... the store is RIGHT BESIDE Outback Steakhouse. I very curtly and firmly said "I can't leave the house, I'm very sorry. But if you need ANYTHING from my pantry or fridge, please come in and help yourself, I have a full pantry and have some fresh chicken. You are welcome to anything I have, but I can't leave the house." She gives me a line of bull about "No thanks, I'll just walk down [3 blocks] to the Chinese place and get some chicken." and she hurry's off my porch as if I had slapped her.

I am very ashamed with myself for saying NO and for allowing an inconvenient, obviously clueless neighbor get on my nerves so bad. (please note, I NEVER lied to her or made excuses, I simply told her the truth and chose not to take her anywhere...and she doesn't ever offer gas money)

I am ashamed with myself... but at the same time, I am pissed off with feeling I'm being taken advantage of.

Sorry for my rant....
I would NEVER say NO to a neighbor that I knew truly needed the help... . But the other day when she asked for a ride, she said "I can't get a cab, can you take me to work?" It was the very day after I got back from the funeral, I said "I'm sorry, I can't, I'm exhausted, but I'm sure the landlady will take you, want me to call her?"... she said "No, can I use your phone?" ... so I handed it to her... she called the taxi service and asked for a taxi, which arrived in less than 10 minutes

This kind of thing has happened ever since she moved in.

Am I being taken advantage of?? Or is it just my raw emotions that make her annoy me?

04-01-2010, 01:52 PM	#1786
Kenna Senior Member How Do You Identify?: Fiery, Sassy, Tough As Nails, Femme Tomboy Preferred Pronoun?: She Relationship Status: I am your favorite hello and hardest goodbye. Join Date: Nov 2009 Location: NC & CO Posts: 4,806 My Photo Gallery Thanks: 4,624 Thanked 12,195 Times in 3,779 Posts Rep Power: 21474856	I am NOT a nasty neighbor, PROMISE... I am ashamed I said NO! Truly, I think this has become a case of "being taken advantage of".... After coming home from dad's funeral (with the exhausting travel headaches and being torn up about having to leave my brother and 2 nieces behind) I have been promptly, nearly every day, bombarded by the young, very able-bodied neighbor to be her "taxi" (this went on before the funeral too), so I posted a HUGE sign that says DO NOT DISTURB on my front door...(with some text explaining that I respectfully needed some rest and not to disturb unless it's urgent)... To be honest, I got tired - after already being exhausted - of this neighbor ringing the door bell several times a day to take her to work or other places (both her jobs are less than 2 miles away and we are on a bus route plus her family lives less than 4 blocks away)... I certainly DON'T mind helping people out and I have always been very proud to be an "old fashioned" helpful, caring neighbor that believes in the kind of community where everyone helps out their neighbors, no matter how small the favor or how inconvenient it may be. But for some reason, for the very first time in my life, a neighbor is REALLY starting to annoy me on a regular basis (maybe it's the overwhelming grief and heartache I've been through that has worn me down?) and for the very first time EVER, I have said NO to a neighbor. After posting the DO NOT DISTURB UNLESS URGENT sign, she rang the door bell 3 days ago and handed me 2 pieces of my mail (I have a mail slot in my door)... (I have told her time and time again NOT to ring the door bell because the dogs go OFF... to knock instead.) She then stood around chatting about NOTHING but her mail and wouldn't make eye contact... then she finally said, "I was gonna ask for a ride to work, but I saw your sign."...Mind you, this was a VERY sunny day that many people would have enjoyed the very short hike to Outback Steakhouse where she works...I told her I had just taken my prescription pain pills that I can't drive with...she said "are you sure?"... I got this cross/serious look on my face and then she stood there hemming and hawing about the items she got in the mail again...then left. Today, my sign is still up and I was enjoying a quiet, peaceful day soaking up the sunshine in my new "work from home office".... I nearly jumped outa my skin when she rang the door bell SEVERAL TIMES quickly... Willy went OFF so bad I had to lock him in the crate (I've tried so hard to break him of this)... I knew who it was. She asked for a ride to the grocery store "to get chicken". While I was trying to control BOTH dogs (who normally are the sweetest dogs EVER, but growl, snarl and snap at her)... I was privately thinking "CAN'T YOU READ? DON'T YOU HAVE ANY RESPECT FOR SOMEONE WHO IS RECENTLY GRIEVING A LOSS? ARE YOU FOR REAL? NOW SERIOUSLY, THIS IS OVER THE TOP!!" .... it's another REALLY beautiful day out and I know for a fact that she is very able-bodied... I told her "No, I have a new job working from home and I can't leave the phones." She says "not even for a couple minutes?" ... inside me, I start to growl!! just like Willy!... the store is RIGHT BESIDE Outback Steakhouse. I very curtly and firmly said "I can't leave the house, I'm very sorry. But if you need ANYTHING from my pantry or fridge, please come in and help yourself, I have a full pantry and have some fresh chicken. You are welcome to anything I have, but I can't leave the house." She gives me a line of bull about "No thanks, I'll just walk down [3 blocks] to the Chinese place and get some chicken." and she hurry's off my porch as if I had slapped her. I am very ashamed with myself for saying NO and for allowing an inconvenient, obviously clueless neighbor get on my nerves so bad. (please note, I NEVER lied to her or made excuses, I simply told her the truth and chose not to take her anywhere...and she doesn't ever offer gas money) I am ashamed with myself... but at the same time, I am pissed off with feeling I'm being taken advantage of. Sorry for my rant.... I would NEVER say NO to a neighbor that I knew truly needed the help... . But the other day when she asked for a ride, she said "I can't get a cab, can you take me to work?" It was the very day after I got back from the funeral, I said "I'm sorry, I can't, I'm exhausted, but I'm sure the landlady will take you, want me to call her?"... she said "No, can I use your phone?" ... so I handed it to her... she called the taxi service and asked for a taxi, which arrived in less than 10 minutes This kind of thing has happened ever since she moved in. Am I being taken advantage of?? Or is it just my raw emotions that make her annoy me?