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Originally Posted by Nadeest
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Thanks for bringing this article to our attention. The part of the article that really spoke to me was about the accusations made by the disgruntled spouse in court about the Trans person. My now wife, had recently separated from her cisgender male husband when I met her. I met her by chance at a B-F dance.
Her ex is a Psychologist and the accusations he made in a court of law were outrageous. (The fact he is a licensed Psychologist makes it even more scary and sad. Some give added cache to doctors, law enforcement, psychologist.) Things like "I have lesbian friends and they have told me that FTM's are very aggressive and prone to violence because of the testosterone." Or, alluding to the possibility there may be sexual misconduct on my part with the minor daughter they share custody. I did not attend any of the divorce hearings. The divorce had nothing to do with me but the remarks, accusations made by a heterosexual cisgender male were sadly familiar.
Living the majority of my life as Butch left me and others vulnerable to homophobia. I had never dated a woman with children previously but many times the heterosexual parents, siblings and friends blatantly expressed their outdated, fearful and homophobic beliefs.
Thankfully, I live in Northern California, a large metropolis with many LGBTQ people living their lives here. The judge was not swayed by the Queerphobia. Then the age old threat that I would be outed as Butch or Trans was made. (Duh.... I have always wondered how some can believe they are outing me, us. My gender expression speaks for itself. Hello, I am not in the closet.)
Thankfully the worst of my "criminal" background is a parking ticket. What happens to others that may have a mistake, blemish from when they were younger and dared to live an authentic life.
Some may believe this post is snarky, perhaps. My motivation is a lifetime of queerphobia, trying to educate others, sharing so that others may not feel so alone or crazy.