[JustBeingMe]

In addition to my first post I will that I now cannot stand crowds, like when you go grocery shopping.....I have to take ativan just to go into a crowded store. My ptsd and anxiety are much worse than it's been in last few years, and they upped my ativan to 3xday now, just to help curtail my anxiety. UGH... I also have a fear of falling.....I often have dreams of falling from great heights like a skyscraper and falling in mid air just wakes me up before I hit the ground and I'm balling like a big ass scared kid. I wonder what would happen if I hit the bottom and didn't wake up? I often think I would die in my sleep if I actually saw myself hit the bottom. IS that even possible?
I don 't know, but I dunt wanna find out. I am also afraid of pitbulls that have been fought before. I just don't trust them at all. But on the other hand, if it's a pitbull someone raised from a pup and wasnt' abusive to them, I'm not afraid of them then. Make sense? I dunnno, just is what it is.
OH and going into the ocean and learning to surf, I"m deathly afraid of sharks attacking. It's on reason I never learned how to surf, I don't want any missing body parts.........just sayin.