First off, I am an mtf, and femme. In a lot of ways, we are on parallel paths, but with both similarities and differences. I cannot say as to whether you are butch or ftm, as that is something that you will have to discover for yourself.
Question 1: I tend to buy female products only, though, at times, I have been forced to purchase male clothing ( workboots and socks).
In one of my culinary classes, I was required to wear black pants, and a white, button down shirt with a tie. This was because I was working as a server, during that class period. I was unable to find any female clothing that would work for me, while fitting the requirements, so I obtained and wore male clothing for that first class. That did not work well for me, at all. I was barely able to handle one table, let alone the three or four tables that was expected of me. It was just very, very difficult for me to function, at all, that day.
The next class period that I had to work as a server, I just plain skipped. I was not about to go anywhere, dressed like that. Fortunately, I was able to find some clothing that would work for me, and still fufill the requirements for the class after that.
My point is, is that I can understand, a tiny bit, of how you feel. In this area, we are similar.
As for Question 2, I suggest that you talk with an experienced gender therapist. They can probably give you some good advice, in this matter.
On Question 3, give yourself time. You will probably start meeting them, if you open yourself to the possibilities. As for what do you do, if you have a femme for a client; what do you do if you have someone with a problem that you have no experience with?