Quote:
Originally Posted by TruTexan
Gee I didn't read take offense to anything she said and I'm a butch lesbian.
It makes me sad when this stuff happens to people, and I"m sure this probably ran her off, I"d be very surprised if it didn't.
|
One of the beautiful and sometimes painfully eye opening aspects of this website that I have found and personally experienced, is the encouragement from its members and ownership to help point out when a member is using language or makes statements that can be read or felt as "othering" or demeaning or creates a sense of lesser than.
This is what I did. I addressed her directly and from "my me place" and without condemning her, I simply explained how her choice of phrase made ME feel. I further added that she may find the type of butch that she is looking for in threads in the Lesbian Zone, which if I am not mistaken, you TruTexan should find agreeable, since you actually started one of the threads I had in mind when making the suggestion. I was sincerely trying to help her find what she appears to be looking for.
Just as she is not responsible for my feelings, only for her choice of words, I am not responsible for her feelings to my response, only how I present my feelings and thoughts to her.
Your attempt to guilt or shame anyone (myself in particular) for how ConCrtAngel reacts is frankly an unnecessary and shit stirring gesture and very manipulative, whether intentional or not.
I do not for one second believe that ConCrtAngel was attempting to deliberately slight anyone or their ID. I am also entitled to express in a positive manner how it made me feel when presented as it was.