Dapper, you ask great questions. Are you a therapist?
I don't know why she doesn't like me or even if she really doesn't like me. All I can do is muse about it. And there's a lot of time to do that working out next to someone at the gym for hours. Maybe I'm not cool enough. Maybe I look at her too much. Maybe she picks up on the fact that I get that there's something strange about her, and my eyes read her in a way that feels threatening/invasive. Maybe she's a guarded person and just ignores people until she knows them through something.
I felt like we had a moment of connection one day recently but it could have just been a mirage, like being in a desert and thinking you see water because you are in such desperate need of it. I had plugged in a dvd player in a way that would trip people. That sounds terrible but I was trying out something new and didn't realize it would do that. So Jill was the first person to trip, a minor stumble. i called out, "Sorry!" thinking it was not set up in a way that would trip everyone, maybe just that one time with Jill. So then Jill got on a piece of equipment nearby. Then this guy came off the basketball court and totally tripped (did not fall but it was a much more major tripping than Jill). I said, "I'm so sorry!" and the guy was embarrassed and also irritated and ignored me. Then I got off my machine and remedied the way I had the cord set up. Anyway before I got off the machine Jill seemed to chuckle at the guy tripping over the cord. However, maybe she was actually chuckling at the t.v. program she was watching. I tried to catch her eye and chuckle with her, not because I thought it was something good to do to laugh at someone tripping because of my stupidity (btw, it was a silent type chuckling that he could not see), but because I was taking my bonding with Jill in any way I could due to its short supply.
Sorry for such a long answer. I was struggling with an answer I don't really have.
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Originally Posted by DapperButch
Why doesn't she like you, do you think? Not, why do you think she doesn't like you, but assuming you are correct, what's the reason that she doesn't/wouldn't?
I don't know you off the board, but you present as someone who would be non-judgemental, open, non-threatening, etc, so it makes me curious Maybe your simple presence of "openness" so to speak, makes her feel too vulnerable, threatened. What's your theory?
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