After coming out back in December since I told my sister I liked chicks and then her telling my mom who then went to telling my brother and my dad. They all think its a phase. I have talked to some people about this, but not many. And my belief is that they think its a phase because they do not know much about lesbians all the way. Society still likes to show mainly butches, you got ellen and rosie on tv. And other more "butch" type of lesbians. Hardly ever do you see "single" and "butch" lesbians much. I am very much single thank you very much and love it. Besides that though, I was so trying to figure myself out and yes I know I should not care about labels but it was getting on my nerves. For awhile I thought I was an ftm, yessir....I said it, an ftm and if someone says something to me about it I think it is starting to become clearer (sp?) to me that I am attracted to ftms more then I am one. I have thought heavily about that one for the past 4 months or so. But then I kinda went and did a search more on black lesbians. Because of course I love darker chicks sometimes and I kinda am one when people talk to me about personality. Whatever that means. I was kinda like DAMN, our "lesbian world" has way to many def for people to fit into. We have so many ways to not only say we are a lesbian but we then fit ourselves into an ever smaller category. But at the end of day and all that kinda talk above...I found myself to be a stem.
I am unable to locate a stem or stud convo/thread on here anywhere
But what I found about what a stud is...they are kinda like thuggish more then a butch. I have asked people about butch dress I guess you could say. And they all seem to say that a stud is basically the ghetto version of a butch.
And then there is obviously the femme, but there is the ghetto femme.
And then there is me...a stem. I very much go either way. I still dont like labels and never will but something tells me we are not over this fight with society and we will prolly always have convos or discussions about what we are.
So I am just going to leave it at this and see what everyone thinks about this.