things you should never say to me, personally (and yes they all happen):
- talk about what celeb you want to fuck
- Ask me, after me telling you that monogamy is a commitment for me, that in order to give you a "chance," at the cake part of our first date, I should be monogamous with you now, since we are now "dating" and you only monogamously date. That waiting for both people to be ready for a commitment is unfair.
- "just come casual. you don't need to dress up. just come in whatever. I'm good with regular clothes (meaning, their clothes), why do you need to dress up? it's just coffee. " *stabs out own eyes in frustration* why do butches here do this to me? I need 90 minutes to clean up from school (bathe, shave, put on make up, do hair, put on something that isn't oil wrecked sports clothes, my school wear). argh!!! NO.
- the "I want a date but I'm too shy to ask for one so i'm going to make a massage appointment" ploy. Yes, I actually DO know that's what you are doing. And boy are you going to get a shock when you actually get round to asking me... when I tell you I can't date you because you are now a patient and even if I don't see you as a patient again, I need to legally have a year between out last clinic appointment and our first date. SUPRISE! Don't cha just wish you'd sucked it up and asked me??
- "well, to be totally honest, the reason I stopped off at home was to borrow money from my girlfriend and the reason we ate pizza in the van on the warf with the back doors open to the view (something I thought was rather cool, I enjoyed that...) was because I didnt want anyone in the pizza place to see me with you."
"Oh. Ok. Im just going to get us beers. Stay right there" And I got my coat from the check, next to the bar, walked out through the fire door by the bar and caught the first bus going anywhere on the street outside.