I don't trust myself...
I don't trust myself, and I'm terrified of being publicly embarrassed. These issues are holdover from high school and university/grad school. I had a few bad relationships and false friendships, plus I was intelligent, but people skills?...Not so much. I called it the foot in mouth syndrome... I also still had no clue about my sexuality.
When I meet someone I start double guessing myself, did that sound stupid? Was that silly to say? Was it rude? Am I boring them? What do I say next?? Will they think my interest in X is weird? Am I talking too much about myself? They are probably not interested anyway... I get so wrapped up in these doubts, I end up sabotaging myself. Or running away.
I've been working on this, and I have gotten better. A few more years, and working in jobs where I have to talk with various people have helped. But still, when I meet someone I'm really attracted to my old foot in mouth syndrome tends to come back... and the doubts. It's still a work in progress.
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