It’s been a wonderful Thanksgiving…as I lay here in my bed I hear soft snores out in my small living room as 3 men sleep peacefully, their bellies full. Three years ago we all shared an apartment together for about a year. We were family.
One is my best friend who is FTM, next is his 23 year old son who dreams of transitioning some day and finally a 22 year old adopted son who is now homeless and still battling alcoholism.
We are missing one more boy…the second son of my best friend who is off on an adventure with his boyfriend in Colorado, and finally my beloved german shepherd heart dog who was incredibly dear to all of us.
I am surrounded by boy energy and I am loving every minute of it…the stinky socks, the hair that needs a good cut, the clothes that need washing…bring it.
I love it and I miss it so much.
I am a fierce femme and mother of a 24 year old son whom I have not seen for 7.5 years because of his religious beliefs. Holidays can be especially excruciating. And yet…I have been given this incredible gift again and again of boy energy…young man energy flowing in over the years to help me not feel so lost.
For a few brief hours in my small apartment bursting with blankets and blow up beds, I am found. I am validated for exactly who I am and appreciated for my nurturing, my mothering and my complete and utter femme-ness in every way, shape and form.
I am grateful, I am thankful, and I am blessed…to know what it is to be lost and truly found.